phil alvin is still the awesomest in the world, as are my friends, & i rest my case.

here's the url, if the above video's not there: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YM3X2fxf79o
i really like & often love inspired oddballs & crazies, tho will never make my life w/one & am working on not being one myself. am not perfect by a mile, but gimme a little richard, robert mitchum, jason williams, herzog, jerry lee, orson welles, bukowski, sterling hayden, timothy carey, a few "real" people i know, etc., any day over the conformist "good-looking" or "attractive" or "successful." insanity & creativity, there's a definite link, & maybe that's what grabs me. creative people, the ones who don't care what society says is "right," make this world! yes, they can be selfish & a**holish, but also i think they're brave, & moreover, movers & shakers (tho in the moment, they may just look nuts). w/o them, culture stagnates, reverts to dark ages. but one aspect of my ardor definitely worries me: someone told me today "we pick people whom we think we deserve" & further that someday my picker will fix & the crazies won't interest me anymore & i won't interest them bc i'll be too healthy & happy. i guess i have to be willing to get to this place, tho.
for now, give me phil alvin over any young "stud." at least phil's interesting to listen to. and boy, he puts on a heck of a show. not to mention the looks. that guy's made to be on the stage. (friends of phil may comment.)
tonight, i recognize how important in my life are these things: family, friends, students, job, & my band of friendly eccentrics. actually, my band members are a great balance of goofball odd ducks (well, randy doesn't seem so odd, but what a swell guy). not to mention that they are strong musicians & kind people.
am so lucky for so much, & that's where i need to keep my eye. re this slump i'm in, you should see the emails i keep getting. it's mind-blowing. in the tiniest way, i know how candye kane must've felt when she found out she had cancer & was flooded w/love & support. (candye is now healthy, thanks, i think, to all that love & a radical change in diet & atittude.) i can't say enough how much i appreciate anyone who's emailed or messaged me to tell me "it's gonna be ok." you are all angels, & i'll keep your correspondence always.