Friday, July 31, 2015


sick sick sick sick sick!
yesterday my 48th bd was really nice, with neat monster diorama & pancakes made by james, our morning viewing of deadwood, which we're binge-viewing on roku at moment; hundreds of heartwarming well-wishes from cyber friends (so many dear sentiments! wow! people are so, so kind! what a wonder life is!); dramatic storm clouds followed by cloudburst & power outage (spooky beautiful cool!); slippery drive thru storm flood & then dry lower san joaquin valley farmlands w husband showing sweet care to frightened kitty; luscious ice cream cone; loving family... but then i got sick!!!! stupid stomach!!!! we went to a bksfld production of anything goes (fine choreography there, professional-level along w singing, & of course, cole porter score we all enjoyed very much) & i suffered (i hope quietly) throughout. arrrgggghhh!! pain!!! but there was no reason to make everyone go home. i've had no fever, so i don't think this spell's gonna make me kick the bucket... what's a little pain? so what? maybe if i ignore it, it'll pass quicker!
anyways, just was on mama's computer looking up stomach pain remedies & wanted to post these in case you don't know about them: peppermint; apple cider vinegar (i have a swig every day, but alas, it's on the mountain right now & we're here in the blast-furnace valley); bitters (any bars around here?); ginger.
when first i met james & his stomach problems were a continuing woe, i used to remind him about the BRAT diet: banana, rice, applesauce, toast. oh, & avoid stuff like dairy, heavy foods (hahahahaha! my husband can eat more than any one human i've ever met! but since The Event in march, his stomach's been much better, the source of his long-term pain not having been crohn's disease or IBS, but bleeding ulcer, now ameliorated!!).
gonna go search the cabinets for one or more remedies now, then return to bed & try not to eat the entire bottle of TUMS (they are delicious...).
may your stomach cooperate. may your socks stay sticker-free! may your nickels not be wooden & your teeth stay in your head!
more later!

Saturday, July 25, 2015


i learned the other night that hotdogs are made up of 25% total mystery "meat". yes, 1/4 of the ingredients in american brats don't have to be reported at all!! yech. offal!!! then i learned two celebs i really like, andrew zimmern of bizarre foods & dave attell of foul-mouthed drunk humor, don't drink anymore, tho i don't know if either are "one of us" ("gooba-gooble, gooba-gobble") (i wonder if anyone will get that reference?) (who cares...) it's inspiring to learn people in the public eye whom i already kinda like & admire for their irreverence & decency could be "one of us"...
just drank too much coffee while editing dad's latest history article (dad's page). people from the bakersfield paper have been trolling dad's articles & siphoning off, not always attributing him. fyi, you supposed "reporters," that is called plagiarism!!! but dad's such a gent, he doesn't say much. HEEEE knows he's doing the original rooting out of story, not the rats that take from him... anyways, dad researches history cause he loves it so, which is why we do things: out of love, not for glory. cause we must!!
that reminds me that i just read about someone who seemingly does everything for greedy, selfish "glory," the billionaire dipsh*t donald *rump, whose asinine comments about veterans, hispanics, other repub presidentio contendores pretty much ensures that eventually someone's gonna kick his butt, or at least slap the wig off his head. can't wait!! hahahahahahah!!!!
well, that's about it except for a million other things... james has a show tonight in smellayland, & that should be big fun! oh, and the storm dumped 3.45 inches of rain over 2 days last week. whew! oh, and i'm reading about 50 different things right now, and oh well, that's about it...have a gneiss wan.
Big head & big head all sweaty after musically slamming the crap out of the place.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

bum ba-bum bum

meeeeeee (hope you sang that, to the tune of the tums tv commercial of old...) i've just not wanted to write for some time... but this morning i realized it's that i haven't wanted to get on my computer because then... i have to... pay... ...
with this realization clear, i leaped up, turned on the ancient laptop, got it done. relief!!!
don't know why i procrastinate so at times. mebbe cause i don't have other bad habits, other than occasional descent into considerable depression & self-pity (& binge eating)... i rip articles from the NYer mag with plan to read them later. there was one on procrastination i kept for some months. but of course, i never read it. (badump-bump!)
geez, it's been a month since i wrote. i had my sobriety bd: 20 YEARS! didn't go to the international drunks convention in atlanta (HOTlanta, as dan m called it). got beautiful flowers from friends, pearls from james, cards, cakes, sobriety chip. my bd was a big huge happy wow. :)
Photo by Kaykay Jagger: me on really nice Roland, James w/new guitar.
mama recently had a 50 years reunion of her bakersfield college choir, the little choir that toured & sang all over europe, becoming the first americans ever to win wales's prestigious eisteddfod festival. at the college, i got to see their informal "concert" (they'd had just one practice) & with the first notes, dad, me, & the man to my right burst into tears. the sound of all of these reunited septuagenarians was that beautiful, that moving. we were watching something special & unique, all these talented once-20-somethings reconvened as 70-somethings, voices & hearts still so filled w/soul & conviction. choir director joe huzsti, who with his wife melinda have been huge life-long mentors to mama, talked about what this choir always has meant to him, tho he's since traveled the world many times, winning  many awards with other, more prestigious choirs, teaching musicians who've gone on to greatness. "they have a special something," he said (i paraphrase), delivering song so sincerely & w/a commitment that makes young musicians sound comparatively plastic. i thought of james. i thought of me. we're certainly not classically-trained maestros, but we are hard-working, hard-loving, hard-stomping & dedicated musical preservationists. the greatest compliment i ever got, i think, was from david nigel lloyd, who called me a "working-man's musician."
mr huszti was on the nose: no matter the musical genre, a few off notes, some clams, if sung or otherwise performed with unabashed, undiluted heart & soul, beam a life force that leaps from stage into the heart of the audience. such a performance can't help but move, being human, humane, transcending rather than "perfect"!
i'm so grateful i got to be there, as well as to help at the after-party at mom & dad's house! what nice folks! what talent! what testament to the power of music & hard work & love!
james has been having a wonderful time lately at his shows, both w/the newly-invigorated band & with me. he says so, & i can tell it's true. i'm so pleased for him!
we've gone out of town left & right. traveling, gigs, visiting family. friends have visited. we've played many music shows together, good, middling, great, fantastic! gotten magical feedback. i've worked at the library. still like it, still disconcerted to be doing one task at a time. i can get immersed in putting the books in order, tho. arranging all the deweys on all the books' spines is calming yet exciting, lulling, tranquilizing yet invigorating, like counting my footfalls when i run. that's the other thing! i've gotten to do some really cool jog-runs! and lotsa fun yardwork! even got some tomatoes growing, tho some butthead varmint's been eating them. and we've had a great time in the morns watching the birds, squirrels, & chipmunks chirping & hopping & munching & splashing at the birdbath/feeder area we set up under the window amongst some trees. the quail have birthed a new branch of the covey, so there's at least 20 of them running around here now, cooing so cutely, fatly, sweetly.
saw a coyote in the arroyo & for the 1st time since i watched one eat my cat in 2011, i didn't wish i could shoot it with a bb gun. as james has said, he's just trying to make a living. other than a deer, bunnies & hares are the only other animals i think i've seen... oh! and the biggest horny toad ever! i guess all the creatures have come down out of the forest to Civilization in search of water...
that's this wkend's biggest news: a huge storm washed in on tails of gulf hurricane. rain was beating the house like the band & i was sitting w/peeweenie (his name when he's being a turd) when i heard a great rushing swooping roar. i ran to the window & what a sight! storm runoff from higher climes had plummeted down the ever-dry, parched arroyo, creating a shooshing restless riverlet, a swifting running muddy creek! i got on galoshes & ran down there to chronicle the event... it smelled wonderful, like colorado used to (sure it still does, but i don't go there no mo) like wet pines, sage, earth.

Mt Pinos rocks (photo by Harriet H) from hike w/H
here comes the rain again! a cool heavy steady mountain shower! the rumble & flash of thunder & lightning! so invigorating! so scary! so beautiful! so overwhelming!
life! ah, life! we have it! :D