twiddletwiddletwiddle & starting over

sitting here for a bit twiddling my thumbs waiting on a few possible return calls/emails. might not get them! i understand if i don´t. we´ĺl see what happens! ... we went to taft to register the beast of a camper van. it was hotter than blazes. james had not been there since we went to rosco´s funeral. rosco was a great human, a funny, kind-hearted guy disguised as a dirty old man. he was important in our lives long ago, & important to james as a friend! he used to set up james´s shows at the oasis, an atmospheric, drunken hole-in-the-wall w/a large neon sign & ¨secret¨ back room said to be from prohibition days ... initially, our trip kind of sucked w/sad feelings about how rosco & the oasis, too, were no longer there & how it was so dang hot, waawaaawaa, grumblegrumblegrumble.... but then we took a minute to start the day over & almost immediately the tide turned! we wandered into the neatest junk store & found out from one of the storeś proprietors that the oasis has reopened! we bought neat junk! then we finally went to eat at asian experience, a restaurant touted by ¨that douchbag¨ guy fieri on tv (we walked in & james pointed, ¨thereś that douchebag!¨ at the big pic of the slickly famous chef on the restaurant wall). i´ve wanted to eat there for a decade, so now we´d get to see what the fuss was about! we shared a garlic pizza that was about the best i´ve ever had in california. the crust definitely was brick-oven-baked!... taft now has a nice grocery outlet, so that was the next stop. we were able to get all kinds of goodies at about half the price of the big supermarkets. :) the drive home was lovely, long shadows falling on the golden mountains & hillsides, fields filled with fruit & nut trees... so there is something to be said for starting the day over bc in this case, it truly worked.

bumbumbumbumbumbumbumbum

-we just sat together & played music on various instruments for quite some time. it started when i dusted off my old kay guitar to attach to it this gadget that arrived in the mail. i thought it would allow me to press a button & play full guitar chords, but it doesn´t. all it is is a panel with buttons that affixes to the guitar neck & instead of using your fingers to make the chords, you push the buttons. so it really does not do much. oh well!... but the guitar was out, so i was in a strumming/picking mood & unbagged my bass, which hasn´t been out to breathe in years. james played his resonator & i the bass & he sang & i backed up on vocals, then we switched to harmonica (him) and me (keyboard piano). and now we are done but it was sure fun, clams & all. can´t wait til he finishes the basement studio so we can have the drums & bass always hooked up & we can play down there any time we want without having to break everything down at the end like we do now. (he´d be happy to leave it all out, but i like the house to be tidy. we run a fine line here between funky eccentric palace of curiosities & hoarder dump.) yes, to have a house studio will be wunderbar. before that, i likely will have my homemade sauna ready, least i hope it will be. what fun it is to work on all of these projects. what fun life is at this moment. even with horrible news in the world. we can make a difference in the lives of those around us, just being who we are. my difference can always be positive now with my head full of 12 steps & body nearing 27 yrs clean & sober. james´s difference can be positive, making people love & laugh & thrill to be near him or negative, making them wish they´d never been born when he pounds the living crap out of them. but he only does that to those who cross him bad, or those who hurt the innocent. in that sense, i am married to batman. mixed with mel blanc. mixed with mike tyson. mixed with the coolest rocknroll american music singer-player i know. james.... - lately i´ve been exercising too much, resulting in less blubber but terrible headaches, so iḿ gonna go rest for a bit... ¨-when i see the many, i cannot act. when i see the one, i can.¨ - paraphrasing mother teresa, this quote applies to us all. may we act for the greater good by doing good to those we meet on the road of life. badumpdump.

yumyumyumyumyum

... food, glorious food, to quote a tune from my earliest favorite movie, oliver, from the novel by the great social activist-writer & performer charles dickens... i am very lucky because unlike oliver twist & unlike far too many on this earth, i often get to enjoy good meals. am reading a book called $2 A DAY. many ppl do not get to have the food choices i have, or maybe that you have, if you are reading this. it is a startling, gut-punch of an eye-opening read, highly worth grabbing, if you see it. have had to take it in small sections bc the book's info steals one's breath & haunts sleep, the way tragedy does. ... yesterday we mealed with the gia family at a posh place near the kern river canyon. its entry featured the largest wrought iron chandelier i've ever seen, a stunning killer of a thing. the walls were adorned with lovely art, particularly a california impressionist painting of now i can't remember. the service was glacial. niece maddy said, rich ppl don't rush. i don't know if that's true. i've thought rich ppl want what they want, when they want it, & they get it. maybe she means europeans. that's what classy papa said as we exited, about 90 mins after the meal started: instead of, my god, your service was terrible, i'm never coming back here again, he smiled & said, you're giving diners the european experience, letting your patrons take their time & not feel rushed while they eat. yes, dad was super happy with the whole thing. he wanted james to try to get a gig there & even brought it up to the proprietor, but james kept catching my eye & mouthing "no." "i would be fired before we finished the first set," he said, & i realized james the blue comedian blues shouter, yes, this tidy chichi low-energy spot of giant windows with rolling vineyard views & politely coiffed country clubbers sipping wine, no, that's no spot for f-bomb king james, the baudy sorceror of sound, nor for me since i don't wanna be anyplace he is not accepted. ... he & maddy both ordered the same dish & their food was not good, but my tacos were one of the yummiest dishes i've ever had. the order was a risk because the name was gross: mushroom & onion tacos. yech. but from the first bite, the tacos were pure succulent umami flavor, shockingly delicious. i had to refrain from groaning with pleasure with eat bite -- they were that good. ... today we sailed, then stopped, then sailed in the accordion formation that is socal traffic, heading for sister sherri's in north orange county. we had such a great day! staying married this long has made for the best life i've ever had. james regaled with story after story, & we sang & air-played along to chuck berry, making googoo eyes as we barked & yelled out our favorite song lines & loudly sang the solos, even, a team in our chuck berry knowledge & fervent fandom. today was yes, the most fun ever one-dayer with james! ... sherri & ben took everyone to sizzler where i again got tasty food, especially the vegetable-heavy salad topped with raisins & sunflower seeds, then splashed with oil & vinegar. sizzler's cheese toast was just as salty-fatty delicious as i remember. the best part was, i got to order from the sr menu so my portions were reasonable. i always make sure i order the cheapest item, no matter who pays. they might not know, but i do. i'm lucky that way, knowing pretty certainly that i will have another meal coming. so i do not have to take advantage of anyone who buys me a meal, & i never will. ...i've taken advantage of people in other ways, of course, but i'm working on making up for those sins & errors. i will at least not commit them today, & if i watch myself, tomorrow, either. one more delicious item to eat: at michoacana ice cream in bakersfield, they sell not just food items like mouth-watering tortas, but paletas, which you must know are creamy mexican popsicles. last week i ordered a PISTACHIO paleta, crammed with chunks of the nuts, absolutely wonderful, & as i turned to leave, noticed they also sell paletas made with pecans... and pine nuts! --- here is a nice pic of james that dad took at the chichi restaurant. i had been crying all morning (it happens about every 9 months or so) & don't look so good, but he sure does, so i publish it here.

gradgiation

...this eve our 8th graders gradgiated, and it was the nicest ceremony ever! i was able to fully enjoy each moment without worrying about stupid varying neurotic bothers such as what people were thinking of me (they weren't). the kids! their speeches, their happiness, their dreams, their trepidations, their nervousness, their smiliness, their lovely formal clothings with gorgeous dresses & gigantic heels & tennis shoes & ties & even a suit, their appreciation of teachers & especially corey (our boss): it was all just-right, heart-warming, kinda-moving, bigtime happy-making. i was mighty glad to be a part... then i came home, ate 10 lbs of cereal, & went on zoom to meet my sponsor. she was too tired to get together which was a good thing bc my makeup had melted & been eaten away along w the raisin bran. what had left the house looking like a somewhat-glamorous & together middle-aged woman now resembled bozo the clown... one more day of work! meantime, james might be embarking on a new career on the same day i end mine for the school year. my hopes for him are high! he is talented, gregarious, genuine (even when being a weirdo goofy manic ham). i believe in him! he can do whatever he puts his mind to. my man!... ok, goodnight for now :D