I am now on the slide into 50! It's okay because Mama says I am getting wiser, and I know even with all the bumps and bruises that have characterized the garden-variety chaos of this short blessed life, I'm fundamentally a good soul surrounded by other good souls. At this moment I look forward with hope and a bit of nervousness, even, cause I mustn't mess up even one day more, the thought of getting older, anticipating closer ties with ever-more loved ones, more honesty, safety, patience, community, closeness, love, warmth. The hard heart of my youth has melted, and this birthday has brought the biggest learning experiences ever... Well, I am dictating this entry into my dad's nook, bringing interesting corrections such as Obama instead of mama and Willie Mays for I don't even know what I'd dictated in that case, but it was not Willie Mays! The era of Dick Tracy and Buck Rogers is upon us - didn't anticipate the unintentionally humorous parts. :-) Let me see... Today we left Frazier Park for Bakersfield after moving a bunch of heavy furniture yesterday with the family back and forth between the towns... James and I both are pretty sore and worn out and tired from it all, for certain, and wiser how to do such things from now on... Mama made my favorite, chicken marbella, and I got from my husband the most beautiful sapphire and topaz dangling earrings as well as expensive makeup I've not bought in a long time and fragrant fruity tea... Then Mom and Dad gave me, wrapped up all fancy, paper towels, toilet paper, and napkins, all that had been missing yesterday in Frazier Park. Everybody got a big kick out of that! Be safe, be happy, be thoughtful, be of grateful heart for bullets dodged literally and figuratively and the every-new-day promise of doing better and still getting to live. I'm am.