geez louise. bettie page is gone.

- was posting manuel's xmas shows (tomorrow at the game in temple city; go to www.myspace.com/bigmannyband to see) & chuckling w/him excitedly about the record when i read that bettie page died. :( 85 yrs old. (not young; she had a heckuva hard life: abuse, pinup yrs, holy roller, insanity - tho in her last photo, at age 80, she looked great!) she made the rest of us women look like little men, i think. considering she's a patrician blonde, gretchen mol did a pretty darn good job as bettie in "the notorious bettie page," getting her spirit (i suppose), but gretchen mol, too, looked like a little man compared to the real bettie.
- she exercised daily before most women did. she had the most perfect, lovely figure (revealed most beautifully in bunny yeager's shots) & bewitching features. i saw color film footage of her once & she was indigenous-brown. she was a teacher for a while. she didn't drink or smoke, which gave me hope when my life was very dark. later in life, she struggled big time w/mental illness. (i did too before i stopped drinking, tho i never stabbed anyone. bettie did.)
- i think if i hadn't had to clean my life up, i'd've been one of these rockabilly gals steeped in bettie-worship, who blackens & rolls her hair just like bettie, dresses just like her, drives herself bonkers being in love w/"being" bettie, but i did, so i don't. plus who am i kidding??
- she was more magical than 500 of her impostores. none can come even close because soul, which bettie had, is organic & free-flowing & imitation is studied & ironic, the opposite of soul. in black & white, she was the sweetest angel, the naughtiest devil, the mightiest queen, & everything in between. the wanna-betties (that sounds harsh; what's a better name?) can't imitate that amazing quality because it was spontaneous & authentic; like elvis impersonators, they can only ape. oo-oo-oo!
- but heck, i guess it's cooler to ape bettie than say... heck, most anyone else. so don't mean to sound unnecessarily harsh, but i think the point is, why ape at all? there'll only ever & always be one bettie page, & now she's gone. so just be yourself!... whatever THAT means!!
- row row row your boat, c'est la vie, memento mori... forry, bettie, the evidence keeps building. i guess ain't none of us getting out alive, so go have fun, friend, kick up your heels & go.