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happy feast day! a few (very) simple thoughts: we're most of us americans "mixtures," but being indigenous american (YES, i use that term!) & italian at thanksgiving (or is that columbus day?) can be confusing!.. did anyone else grow up baffled about "what you are"? i've always loved the words, the music, the philosophy of underdogs, misfits, sad-sacks, & downright nutcases because anyone who's not these things more likely has instructions to life, privilege, slickness, conventional beauty, ideological certainty, those things that allow them to be on top, a lot of times by stepping on the heads of others. who needs them!! to paraphrase the christians, the meek shall inherit the earth, & you know what they say about the rich man entering heaven...
and i attribute this misfit-love to being mixed-race, being, like most of us USAnians, a "mutt." our dear little grandma was juaneno mission "indian" from san juan capistrano. she was devoutly catholic, & for that reason, i never bash the Church. i see a rosary or a "blessed mother" statue & think of grandma mary. the tribe has gotten very active & is one of those so close, yet so far from federal recognition, at which point we build casinos & get scholarship money. why not? i think such reward, tho insufficient (yes, & cynical), is tiny payback for near-eradication of an entire race. grandpa was mexican via chile, but i know nothing of his background, really - just have surmised that he was a talented, brainy man poisoned by cultural self-loathing from prejudice... all i know of the other side is that in italy, all the cousins, irregardless of age, drank vino, & "Papa" was always on tv. they served this regional dish, a ham loaf with eggs & pimientos & such that tasted (i'm sorry to have to admit this) just gross. dad said his uncle & father used to come home from union events talking about guys standing on the factory scaffolding & throwing hammers at scabs. sounds pretty old-world-violent. such are the measures to which the disenfranchised may resort to claw for power, i think. i wouldn't know, always having been lower-mid to (now) mid-class. we kinds kill ourselves with affluenza, self-absorption, & idle hands, i think. my last quadrant is english, & i know nada of that except that my dad was raised by a kindly, patient, parsimonious grandpa whom i never met but am grateful for because i think he taught my dad to be the gentle, circumspect man he is. that grandma's an ex-deputy, 83, a world traveler. :)
anyway, thanksgiving celebrates something very weird & uncelebratory, when you get down to it, so like so many things, i prefer to limn, float across the reality so that i may keep myself dopily grinning. to get into its implications, well, it's just too heartbreaking & makes me worthless. thanksgiving fundamentally for me is about loved ones, & giving thanks. i have a wonderful, precious family & so much love in my life. i have food, shelter, companions, music, books, opportunities for service to fellow humans, the things a soul needs. i also am 11 yrs past my due date, so on thanksgiving, i will give thanks for having another day on this precious planet. hope if you're reading this, you, too, may find good things for which to give thanks, & take action to improve the bad. if you want to comment on family or heritage, please do.