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the other day i was happier than can be because we were listening to cool music, dancing around the living room, & then i was exercising. the next day i felt free free free driving out lockwood valley, which looks a bit like northerly texas but with different trees, & bought humane eggs & sourdough bagels & apple butter from a nice young woman on a spacious working farm. then i was instructed to walk past a fence &'d be on a trail, & from there i veered off & explored an abandoned bsa camp, climbing through the tall trees up to the chapel benches where score upon score of forgotten obedient boys worshipped their lord, then down to their tattered & abandoned bunks, spooky because you know part of the reason the boy scouts doesn't really exist anymore is all the abuse those obedient boys suffered at the hands of monsters they trusted... fortunately after that there was plenty else to see, a great mess hall, a climbing wall, a dried-out pool, a wild-west-looking structure for some no-doubt-fun purpose, & man, those scouts got to learn & experience some great things, & certainly not all of them were abused, tho for every one that was, i hope each filthy predator burns in eternal hellfire on earth & (if there is one) afterearth... i used to adventure all the time & it was lonely good times to do so again in the soaring sighing outdoors. today is veterans' day, which james (thank you for his service) usually spends in bed til it blows over, so yesterday & today i shoveled 1 ton of gravel onto the second driveway & felt pretty good, tho now pretty sore, as you'd expect. i give many thanks for being able to do such a thing at my age, for life, health, the good fortune to be born here at this time, when mixed-race & brown people & women have some rights still, more than other places on earth & less than in yet others, & to own this house & our cars because times is rough in these united states, so many are suffering, needlessly, cruelly so, but right now, at least right now, we are ok. we can give back & help others, like you probably do. and we still got cool music, dancing, exercising, exploring, love, laughs, tribulations, sobriety, life. still on this side of the soil, there's much for which to be grateful.