rockabilly jamboree this friday in bakersfield!

downbeat will be 9 pm with DUSK DEVILS!!!! we're gonna rocknroll all night... everything's all right :)i will give you my dusk devils guarantee i will do my earthly best to put on the best show i can!
as for karling, she's not just beautiful, but super-talented & a great songwriter & also very kind... i know you'll love her set, too! my eyes are only just a tad brown, saying that. i am so happy to back her, truly! :)
as for the other fellows, well, they look like they could possibly blow the doors off the joint. don't miss it, if you can!

please send me to charm school

... or wherever they teach you to pose like a girl (i.e., 50s pinup, in this genre, i spose). i know i'm not doing bad for a "middle-aged broad," but it's embarrassing to play/have played in bands w/women who are quite glamorous & yet come off (me, that is) this consistently dorky in photos (yet, i post them)... and why in heck was i smoking? i really do look "wrong" smoking, as some people've told me... argh.
- intellectually i know there's nothing wrong w/just being a human in photos, wrinkles, squints, fat rolls, dippiness, ugliness, imperfections, HUMANITY & all... but man, it can be tough, esp in this social media age, plus being a performer & kinda reliant on projecting a physical image... what's the effect of the former, i wonder, on kids? it seems to me more youngsters than not are a bit too pose-perfect & always ready for their closeup, having grown up w/noses in media devices... google "duck face" -- not just teenaged girls do it -- adults aside (on which duck face or its cousin contrivances can look rather pathetic, doncha think?), i recently saw a slew of photos of a little boy now about 8 yrs old, brother of a former student, mugging it up in that goofy-yet-glamorous way kids who've grown up photographing themselves to post to social media sites all seem to have... it's kinda weird, isn't it? do you recall when kids -- or any of us, except maybe actors & models -- had no preconceived idea or anxiety, really, about how they looked in photos? (i had a free-floating, amorphous anxiety, but it was that i was ugly -- it never occurred to me that a particular pose or angle would fix that ugliness...) hmm... that last pt makes me wonder: is the constant visual diary most kids keep of themselves these days boosting their confidence or making them feel more self-conscious? (recently i saw a woman had posted her daughter's pic, to this response from daughter: "OMG!!! MOM!!!! you know that's my bad side!! i hate this picture!!!") are we getting more narcissistic? realistic? calculating? neurotic? a little of all? i mean, w/in a culture's (mostly unspoken) dictates, each of us has a gendered & performative role... maybe these kids who've grown up self-photoing for instant upload are better able to fit into this game called american society...
guess all this musing just makes me sound old... oh well.
karling is supposed to come up & stay (we might make a comic book, i hope, but probably just will watch "spider baby," which she, a monster movie fan, somehow's never seen). maybe i can get pointers from karling, who is extraordinarily glamorous, as well as kind & very talented... at the hike i took a few wks ago, one of the gals, stephanie, is a photographer, & before we got our photo taken, she told me to do something w/one foot, then pull out & tuck my chin. that is a start, i spose...
i like our young rhythm section right now. they are not just cuties, but good musicians. overall, i am  happy musically, & i know our folks gave me good genes, so can't complain too, too much. :)

wheeeeeeeeee!!!

one door shuts, another opens. i have dropped one band & am a tad sad about it because of some of its fun members & friends, but actually i'm mostly relieved cause i need to make sure i'm in positive environments as much as possible!... the door that has opened means wednesday i get to go play bass with big manny! then wednesday night is a karling & the atomics show w/deke dickerson. then thursday we record, or start to... add to this, dusk devils have gigs & opportunities. finally, my friend down south says he has guys who will back me, if i want to play shows down there... wow! yes, i'm wading in the stream of music, as phil alvin said one must, if one wants to be a part, & the water is not just fine, but wonderful: come on in! my life is incredible, i say, w/o arrogance, but w/wonder. i never dreamed it could go this direction, w/my "sensitive" (wimpy?) temperament & mood struggles. (heck, everyone's got their problems... those just are mine.) i know & meet so many fabulous & talented humans all the time, as well as the occasional untalented & even mean one, as well as many more who are someplace in-between: most of us are a mixed bag, of course, humans "just trying to live," as friends have said. there are bad eggs, for sure, but must remember: "if i knew all, i'd understand all." every bad egg has some kind of bad story, is what i've learned... others are our teachers -- of what we want to be & what we don't want to be, as well as reminders of what we've been & don't want to be again. yes, to've experienced such anger from someone i considered a friend was shocking, but then i had to admit, i've been that person before & could be again. what i reap, i sow. do i believe that? not sure. maybe it's just life... may difficulties be water under the bridge, w/no lingering resentment or anger... our folks didn't raise us that way, &, at least for now, life goes on! so friends, let's play music, make new bonds, treasure loved ones, live life! not sure to whom i'm addressing this, but it's a good sentiment for cultivating a grateful heart, i think: "thank you for what you've given me, & thank you for what you've taken away..." xo to all

karling, cattie, lessons learned, devils, music, travel, friendship, & chuggachuggachugga choochoo

i want to write, i want to write, i want to want to want to write...full of cereal, laying-around-with-dogs, zapped from long phone conversations today (usually i eschew phone, but am so glad i answered it cause sometimes friends reach out & i'm so glad i was there)... geez; there's so much to write about, too... argh. ok, here goes: went to france, led by b, to whom i'm grateful for organizing the trip, even w/times of disconcerting roughness. experienced w/france, she led us four to paris, where we got to stay in center of town in a gorgeous historical apartment, near louvre, tuillieries, not far from the seine. i got the apartment loft for several days, turning it over to fabi when she arrived. went jogging at palais royale. little kids chased me & giggled cause people in paris don't really jog, esp females. went to a rockabilly-swing music show @ the moulin rouge. pianist fabian was awesome, but i don't speak french. oh well. fabi danced w/a boy dressed like a ww2 soldier. he later showed up @ the attignat fest looking like an extra from guys & dolls. a beautiful kid, blue-eyed, dark-haired. french people generally are beautiful. became object of adoration of a sweet young guy named lucien, who also didn't speak english. it was puzzling... i was flattered & scared. he even jumped metro trains to come back & try to get me to go have coffee w/him. i was glad the other "girls" were there. onward. made friends w/eccentric, free-spirited, fun, willful laurie; i was grateful for her kindness. saw a hushed medieval village, perouges, where maybe i had some deja-vu. visited many stunning churches & cathedrals; i'm not religious, but i am dialed to be high, & the beautiful things of this world, such as catholic palaces of worship, stir my soul & aesthetic pleasure, not to mention remind me of our dear departed grandma, who was devout. took beautiful bullet trains: paris to lyon, paris to rennes. walked & walked & walked & walked. got to know the metro system. smoked galoise cigarettes & went on adventures w/laurie. fell in love w/wearing scarves, which immediately dress up & girly-fy any outfit (tho french men wear them, too, as well as color, & look terrific). fell in love w/french bread, &, to my detriment, perhaps, butter. went to the rocks at carnac, the cairn at gavrinis (i bumped my head inside the latter). made the pilgrimage to mont san michel, walking there & back in torrential rain & wind. had 90% incredible meals & desserts & coffees, including one particularly amazing feast after our attignat rockabilly fest show, an ultra-rave-up during which i played not just w/cattie ness, but with paris's hot rocks trio, who called me up to sit in w/them! back to the feast: after we played, the club owners heaped the table w/breads, cheeses, meats, pickles, butter, water, &, at end, trays of coffee w/steamed milk & sugar... it was not just beautiful, but so delicious! i also couldn't help falling in love w/the ultra-rockin' hot-rocks trio: red dennis, baby-faced, tough-guy ted w/whom i'll chat more next time, when i can speak french; intellectual, accomplished, well-dressed alexis, stoic til he discusses american music, & then his serious eyes glimmer w/yearning; & generous, full-of-life, trilingual francis, laughing, friendly, w/louis prima's ursine bearing & gerard depardieu's flirty burr of a voice... i was so smitten w/francis, but then met his wife & was just as smitten w/her. what a lovely couple! on our last night, they treated us to raclette @ their cheerful vintage-decored pad on the edges of paris, & what a beautiful time that was, chatting warmly in our pidgin french-spanish & english (only francis is fluent in all), listening to gypsy jazz & rockabilly, admiring their proximity to both the music university & concert park, & eating this amazing raclette, which is a dish of melted cheese & potatoes... well, there's so much more i could write, such as about all the swell musicians i got to meet & watch at the attignat festival, as well as its fervent, friendly, innocent-in-their-joy fans, & other places we went, things we saw, etc etc etc... will try to post pix sometimes soon. upon return home, i hung out w/my dear family, then had a gig w/karling as well as dusk devils at rockwell's trouts in bakersfield. the funnest [sic] parts were our ramrod dusk devils set, sans bassist cause robbie was up on the mtn, during which the small crowd laughed & laughed & smiled & cheered & oh, how i so love that feeling... then karling came up & she & i sang "let's have a party" collins kids-style, which was quite pleasing & silly & fun for me, & i believe for her, too... two days later we had the barndance in burbank at which we bulled our way thru our short rockin DDs set, then karling's, then got to hang out all eve w/legends of the american music scene, most excitingly for me, of course, phil alvin, who was typically amazing in his part of the show...the hollywood borracho crowd of jonny whiteside, raucous walter, groovy rednecks' tex, & brian hogan were fun, dave stuckey & marty rifkin friendly & musically amazing; other than these folks, i mostly visited w/skip edwards (THE fantastic house pianist) & art fein, art & i drawn in from the patio goggle-eyed by a super-rockin sound that turned out to be 3 bad jacks. they were green-bay-rockin-50s caliber that night! another highlight was how much fun bassist robbie had at the show, so, so excited to meet his hero rosie flores as well as many pretty girls (robbie is a young looker)... we had a terrific bd party for dad in bakersfield next day, & the following i was able to head back to the mountains w/the doggies, now just sitting here cooling my heels & waiting for the next show, which won't be til next week... that's about it for now. likely time for another dog-nap, which unlike a catnap, can stretch the whole dang day.. this lazy, lovely weather's just ripe for it. love to anyone still reading. may i suggest finding now some transcendentalist poems? or maybe a good-rockin tune or twenty...

home is where the heart is; "i keep right on believing / in a foo-oo-oo-ool's paradise" :)

yes, dat's me, in a quote from a cochran bros song we'll sing tomorrow at the barndance (mention at bottom)... well, the weed-whacker's broken, & i could really use it to clear away 3 wks of growth that came up while i was gone... guess the weeds didn't get word to stop growing! taking a little break & spose would like to write about my trip to beautiful france & the friends i made, adventures had, sights seen, music enjoyed, then yesterday's gig w/dusk devils (slamming!) & karling & atomics (mom & dad slow-danced! i messed up 2x cause i was trying not to cry)... it was in general a wonderful trip, & i got to have some dear & lovely experiences, but still am jetlagged, so that's it for now except here's an action shot of karling & i from the gig we did the night before i left for france... i like it :) more later; love to all, & i mean it. :)

ps - tomorrow we play at ronnie mack's barn dance for the gene & eddie tribute show... 7:30 dusk devils; 7:45 karling & the atomics... so many big names'll be there, including phil alvin, rosie flores, big sandy, dave & deke, eddie nichols, buzz campbell, ray campi, russell scott, & many many more... :) i can't wait! here's electric earl's listing for it: http://www.electricearl.com/BDance.html

ooh-la-la!!!

je suis americaine. most certainly! we are in paris, beaky, fabulosa, & laurie lort & i. having a ball, an adventure. only have a moment to write here, so just a few impressions: i knew the women would be gorgeous, but for heaven's sake, the men are, too! :tall, straight build, dark hair & eyes, strong face, serious mien... they dress nicely, too, tho they don't smell so nice, in general... mon dieu! our "girl gang," specifically fabiola, all have commented something about getting whiplash while here from male-gawking. rick, blasters soundman & fb friend, said, "just be sure to turn from the waist. it's good for the core." ha! :) ok, well, this is our last full day in paree (been here a wk) & i've been cleaning up our apt as well as enjoying the sound & smell of the intermittent showers ("it's paris rain," says becky, meaning, it showers for a few mins, then the sun shines, then more showers, then sun... it's truly lovely)... now i'm off to find the drunk club of paris, & tho i mapped out the metro rt, think i'll walk, just to see a bit more... they have english-speaking meetings... hope to get there. tomorrow we're heading for mont san michel, then back here for a night before out to the avignon area for the rockabilly fest called "blue monday," where we'll play some music as well as listen, meet folks, say hello to memphis mike's friend, rockabilly legend hayden thompson. will write more later. i've been trying to keep a journal of what we're doing lately, as well as take pix w/ipod. last time i went to paris, w/mama, angie, mad, i forgot my camera, which was incredibly lame. this time, when i get home, i will document the trip & hope to to-my-best convey the fun we've been having, 1/2-world away from home... bon journee, mon amis :)

Sister Rosetta Tharpe Didn't It Rain

iconoclast rocker chuck e weiss posted this on facebook... good heavens!! truly!!! all i know is that granada television, which also filmed my most favorite tv event of all time, "don't knock the rock," filmed this in 1964 at a train station in chorlton england... don't you love everything?? -- from using train tracks as the stage, her entrance, her lovely face, her outfit, her singing & strutting &, my lord, that guitar playing -- what a prickly, gut-bucket happy rousing sound!!
well, it snowed last night, & i woke to it melting off the eaves in a waterfall & sun shining & air smelling of pine trees & sage & earth, oh how lovely lovely lovely... right now there are no less than 25 birds eating on the table (i shooed off the robber chipmunk who's been trying to abscond w/their food) & in the oak tree in front of me, all puffed up cause now it's raining, hence this incredible historical vid being at this moment, for me, especially apropos... supposed to be packing for france, but heck, my bed's so lovely & the weather's so gorgeous & sleepy & miraculous... thank goodness today sadsack's gone & yesterday i got in a 6 mile run that seemed to shake my seeming-to-be-impending illness & then had a great time w/my friend having salad & then practice w/kind & smart & funny karling & all (wait - that was monday)... oh well. improvement in mood, no improvement in memory... be well, not crappy, but happy, even snappy... bye for now.

oh brother, where art thou?

- today was easter. passover. springtime. sunday. how are you? i can't sleep. horrid headache. monstrous. monstress. sister & niece may've spread to me today their germs. blast. might be, tho, that the squirrel residing in brain for past month, now gone, left behind serious cranial pain. been having bad headaches... yes, i miss that stupid squirrel, who couldn't focus, but who felt so on fire, & tho frequently worn out, didn't care about much & was creative & felt wily & like she was a barrel of monkeys. i thought the scholar'd taken her place, but scholar was only here for two days & looks like sadsack's in residence, instead. hope sadsack doesn't stay long. no fun. no creativity. lots of moping & defensiveness. gets fat. at worst, has suicidal ideation, outbursts, goes to hospitals.
- i argued today w/person who says i am like two separate people & don't remember things i say/do when i'm "that other person." could be true, perhaps. i mean, sometimes what comes out of my mouth is like pea soup from linda blair in the exorcist. and it's true, i don't remember the crap that spews forth; it's all kinda fuzzy. when i was younger, i'd see red & everything'd be bad before i could stop it. it happens less now, but i spose is still kinda scary, if i think about it, so i won't.
- w/another friend am sposed to discuss this kinda stuff which i spose is related to dissociation, etc. i hope it'll be helpful for us both. this friend, troubled & brilliant, operates on a different time frame, tho, so i can't hold my breath. but do hope to get some feedback eventually... (still can't help wondering, even if it's kinda scary @ times, if it's real or merely overreaction from certain people i know/have known... hmmm...)
- anyways, easter generally was solid: ex-hubby blb brought the dogs (our sons) up to the mtns yesterday so we could visit, b, me, & the mcgraws, our sweet friends. b went home after friendly meal & hike; this a.m., bill & i read rumi & earth poems & we all gazed @ the mtns out my windows & were clam-happy. they headed home to SD & i took doggies to bako to feast hosted, as always, by generous, loving mom & dad w/family & extended- & super-extended family (ex: all in one rm, hanging out, are sister; sister's ex-hubby & his girlfriend; daughter's friend, who is living w/sis's ex-hubby & sis; daughter; sis's spouse-to-be; sis's childhood best friend). in eve, went to movies w/ex-bf & saw chronicle, not at all a bad flick. had ok time, tho as usual interaction was kinda odd & sad for both, i think...
- home now at my folks', waiting for tomorrow's practice w/karling & co, gig saturday, & sunday hopping on plane w/becky for france. blowing this pop stand. should be thrilled... will be, i just know it... took train to hanford the other day & met becky & L; we lunched on sandwiches, chips, & immense ice cream scoops at superior dairy, then ultra-fashion-wise becky took me & L to forever 21, a store i've never shopped in, & i found clothes for paris & she helped me start to see how fun the whole trip is gonna be, just us four "girls" in gay paree, footloose & fancy-free... we saw a very cool wall sculpture of a yugo car frame, opened up & splayed flat like a gigantic rusted beetle; then i caught the train home & met the nicest young man, a hiphop singer, & made other friends, as well... this was in the squirrel's last day; it felt like i was one of the "ambassadors of the human race" i'd read about one time in the NYer. it's lovely to feel so warm & happy & inviting toward all people. sadsack just doesn't.
- wisest words read lately: "praise allah, but be sure to tie up your camel." also: "may all the voices you hear be helpful ones." that will be swell, when it happens again. come back, little squirrely. i miss you already.

blablablablablablablablabla, but not at all "blah"

how are you? i am well. now, since on a blog, one writes about one's life/etc, how to describe the last many days? will try.
had fast, smooth ride out to donna's; feeling naturally wired lately seems to make time pass quickly & entertainingly, tho at worst, i am confused & discombobulated due to inability to organize... got to my friend's & we leaped on ea other w/happiness & headed to denny's, where i was rewarded by one of her spontaneously slapstick moments when she somehow stuck the soda straw in her eye... donna can be quite serious & intense, but i also have had some of the funniest moments ever w/her, face hurting from all the laughing we do (actually, another friend of mine, now that i think of it, much reminds me of this; i'd been prepared for him to gig me on april fool's day, convinced he could NEVER do it for a 3rd yr in a row, but dang if he didn't!!)... friends now 20 yrs, donna & i caught up; when i told her about my crazy fun peripatetic life these days, she commented, "everyone wants a piece of jenny. you're popular!" zoinks! i laughed out loud; me? popular? wow!! whether it's true or not don't matter; i was delighted & shocked to hear this - me, who used to cry when teacher'd call on me. :) how life can change people, if we stay open to it, huh? :) i think the comment speaks as much, tho, for my friend's generosity, to compliment me that way :) ... next a.m. brought SPECTACULAR fun running the claremont "mills," this wilderness running/biking course up & down tall mtn paths; oh! what a wonderful time that was! i wish i had places like that, well-traveled, well-defined paths overlooking nature, that i could visit every day... here is all wilderness, of course, but the defined runs are along the stinky highway, or only a mile or so... anyways, onward:
(was just outside & vagabond kitty, who comes to visit, then is on her merry way for another adventure, was sniffing my truck bumper. i wonder what it smelled like that caught her nose?)
ok, we went thrifting & yardsaling, as is donna's & my bargain-hunting m.o., & just after i told my friend i was looking for yard art, an awesome statue appeared at one yardsale, this cambodian or chinese or some east-asian figurine, for THREE BUCKS!!! "wow," said i, "some folks would say we manifested our reality just now." she replied matter-of-factedly, "i always do..." hmmm... she does have the most impeccably decorated house, all super-thrift, but all super elegant-looking, too, truly!, & i've noticed she'll say, for instance, "i think i'm going to change my color scheme to tans," then we'll go out & dang if she doesn't find a whole bunch of linens & decorative stuff in tans for dirt cheap! she got me a lovely skirt that i will wear to france... taking it on train tomorrow to show to becky, who's leading our tour of la belle france (have i mentioned this here? dunno...) & hope she approves. becky wants us to look "elegant" for the blue monday rockabilly fest we're playing. "elegant" is NOT my strong point. i hope i'll get up to snuff...
on a whim, donna said yes, she'd like to go listen to music, so we embarked on a madcap drive on the freeways of lost angeles & wound up in a dark, smoky blues club packed w/revelers & bluesmen & impeccably taut & sexy burlesque dancers... i kept wanting to leave, once i'd heard the acoustic, old-timey wingnut set i was interested in, but she was enjoying the music, so i left her at the barstool & spent much of the eve outside looking for stars in the cloudy sky & smoking, tho i usually don't, & met a fun, crazy gal who told me she makes her boyfriend's stage suits (how cool is THAT?) & riffing & jumping & promenading around w/mad others, then we headed home & got completely lost, but it had to be funny in the end. we must've driven 50 extra miles getting home!! next day we went to the pomona arts colony, where they were having a flea market. yesss!!!!! i got a tiny strutting baby figurine that might be quite old, judging by his little outfit, plus a tiny old-time radio figurine, each for a quarter from a nice old man, & some pretty dresses, one i hope will work for france... i hit the road for points south to, i thought, listen to more music, but my friend who was having the show, i later learned, got hurt & was m.i.a. for the eve. still, oblivious to the extent of things, i ultimately had sufficient fun, walking around a beach town & having a juice & then some miso soup & then some apples & bananas, then, feeling all healthy, a cigarette, & that night saw bridesmaids & a cool cartoon show called "adventure time" & had a pleasant-enough, nice breather... next morning i headed to big's in fullerton for rehearsal w/karling & the atomics in the joint's small conference rm; all were gathered at the table, maybe nursing hangovers, & i got a free plate of grub from the buffet (good stuff!) & we all waited for brian paxton to get there from bakersfield, then set up & had a nice rehearsal... karling has quite a strong, street-corner voice, i think, when she goes unmiked. cool! my old friend manuel (big manny) couldn't make it cause he was recuperating from knee surgery, but i had a nice talk w/him while waiting & will see him on may 7 for the special "gene & eddie" barndance at joe's in burbank... yay!... the opening band, high energy, did some songs we do in dusk devils, like mercy (last week's openers, dead zed's choppers, a band i enjoyed, do blue moon baby), then handsome young michael walley came up & did some bagpipe tunes, like he'd done last week in lompoc, tho sans his kilted garb, & the vibe of the joint immediately went into a sort of mysterious reverie & even reverence when the first drones sounded... then we went up & i got to play facing a table of the cutest little girls! from harsh experience, i know i always, always need to bring my amp (never again will i go thru the house; that just sets me up to have bad sound), so since i could hear, i was able to play some stuff that had me thinking, wow! where's this coming from? it was too cool... the set went really well; karling twirled & twirled, which is always a good sign, & anthony redhorse, guest on doghouse bass, filled in very musically. i thought we sounded really tight, & karling said afterward people told her her band's never sounded so good! :) soundman tim maag, he of the punk rock lineage & sly bedroom eyes, complimented me highly on harmonies & playing. "i soloed you on the buck owens songs," he said. "you sounded really great! like buck owens!" i got some dough, then snuck out to see if my injured friend was ok. if he wasn't gonna be at his sunday jam up in whittier, i would head to echo park to see my stepson & his gal, the latter whom i'd not yet met, & then be able to get home a day earlier. i pulled up to the frog pond & walked on in to compliments from a handsome biker! wow!, & there was my friend, looking ashen & kinda banged up, but vertical... he came over wild-eyed & said, "you got your keys?" i said yes, we went & grabbed them, & i got to play more music w/him & his guitarist, even! wow! these are well-known, accomplished, & beloved musicians... it was so swell! again, having my amp right there, i could play what my mind heard for the most part, & on a lot of it i tried to stick to horn-like stabs, since already there were two guitars on the stage, tho i did rip out some solos they threw me, & some sounded ok-enough, i must say!... they wanted me to sing, but all i could come up w/was "my babe." after, my friend said it hurt to sing cause of his injury & dang, if i'd known that, i would've tried harder to think of more bluesy songs! as-was, others came up & sang & it was fun to back them, see the enjoyment in their faces as they vocalized... the coolest part of this stint was when one little gal was singing & this biker chick to my side lit the cigarette i'd been goofing w/& i smoked & played piano & looked around & people were laughing! my friend, who was watching, later said, "you're really funny. you're like a comic. people dig you a lot!" that was the best of all... also, several people came up at both gigs & quizzed me on how long i'd been playing piano & complimented my technique. one big samoan-looking fellow, who turns out had mutual friends, said, "yeah, i told myself, 'she knows what she's doing; it's just natural to you, you can tell'," & tim maag had said some amazing things, like that i had "economy of energy & motion." wow!! life can be strangely wonderful, don't you think?
i hung out a bit, then hit the road for echo park & greeted my stepson at his bitchin pad off glendale blvd. he had to get to bed for work, & so next morning i got to explore old, hilly, seedy, beautiful, urban but leafy echo park for the 1st time. loved climbing steep, steep streets, right there in los angeles, for pete's sake!; at one particularly cool, large old rock house, an elderly mexican lady in peasant-looking garb was sweeping her porch & as i passed her house, i spied her million-dollar view of los angeles! it made me happy that real folks had these amazing views, not just rich folks... cody's girlfriend kate, a brilliant, science-minded, sweet girl, told me that's what in-part attracted them to the neighborhood, that it was such a mixture socioeconomically & racially... before actually meeting kate, i found her a beautiful blue sparkly dress i thought would look nice on her, & which i was so happy that she loved!, & him a shocking t-shirt w/graphic of gorgeous mummy-woman at out of the closet's $1 rack, plus a t-shirt i'll wear today at practice that announces, "i just don't listen." because it's true. i'm not sure why i don't listen. but i don't... stepson has taken a long time to meet someone to love, but now he has, & they have a lovely life together, i can tell, in the coolest condo overlooking echo park itself & the gorgeous LA skyline, & i'm so happy for him. :) little cody, happy at last. :) everyone deserves to be happy, i say!!
cody treated us to soup plantation, then i hugged them goodbye & hit the road. like always, as soon as i spotted my mountain town, all my stress fell off & i just sighed a big "aaaaaahhhh"... in my house, i felt peace & calm, a different kind of happiness. it had been such a great trip, but how nice it is to be home, lovely, sweet home. :)
if you're still reading, i thank you for your intrepidness, & hope you'll comment. carpe diem, friends. carpe diem! :)
time to pack up & go again! feliz dia, amigos!

boo

a jolly mania numero uno

worth a gander!

wow! check these out!!
www.culturalequity.org
www.curious-places.blogspot.com ...and these. heehee. :)

30 days is nothing to sneeze about!

some recent photos...
thanks to brian p for taking these pix! and congrats to my friend who now has 30+ days w/o booze. hope if you're reading this you have a swell week. :)

department of "who gives a rat's..."

it's a week w/o gigs, a week to breathe. it's lovely here, as you may have ascertained if ever you've read this blog. the dogs are snoozing. a friend asked what is important to me, so below i reflect.
loves kids. loves teens. loves people. tries not to swear. loves the roots. loves the piano. loves exercise. loves vigor, energy, big ideas, wonder. loves to exercise. loves nature. loves cities. loves driving & back roads & travel & old things. loves animals. loves monsters, eccentrics, underdogs. loves lots & lots. loves life. loves thrift & adventure, meditation, calm, wildness. loves to write & draw & read. doesn't know how to love men. wants to. has mood swings. two left feet. addictions. dark thoughts. very bright ones. wants to be good. wants to have fun & be helpful. succeeds a lot. idealistic & fortunate. much like you, i bet, even if details vary.

"i need a man, i need a man, i need a man to love..."

both bands i play with tomorrow night @ narducci's in bakersfield feature in their sets the above barbara pittman rockabilly tune (actually called simply "i need a man," always evoking cracks from male band members when announced)... i hear this show, affiliated w/the big hot rod deal called the march meets, is going to be packed to the walls; i hope for a music-heavy eve & that my wardrobe change between bands (from punk-monsterbilly to my attempt at elegant) will be swift & successful.
- what fun it is to back karling & becky in their bands, karling & the atomics & cattie ness & the revenge, respectively... this wkend, too, will be dusk devils practice w/low-key but high-energy bassist & drummer who are locked in tight; the other night at practice when john leaned over & cued stevo, i about fell over cause i know that's what bassists & drummers are supposed to do (they are, as carl leyland reminded me, the rhythm SECTION), but i've never actually seen any bass-drum players in DDs work together like that... after the march 17 DD show, we'll practice w/another bassist, a rockabilly kinda cat w/great chops, w/hopes of always having a line-up ready to go, whatever show comes up... ok, that's all for now.

what i assume you shall assume, for every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you...

I have perceiv’d that to be with those I like is enough,
To stop in company with the rest at evening is enough,
To be surrounded by beautiful, curious, breathing, laughing flesh is enough,
To pass among them, or touch any one,
or rest my arm ever so lightly round his or her neck for a moment—what is this, then?
I do not ask any more delight—I swim in it, as in a sea.
There is something in staying close to men and women, and looking on them,
and in the contact and odor of them, that pleases the soul well;
All things please the soul—but these please the soul well.

here i is, i is here (for now, that is)

photo by brian paxton (top), karling & the atomics (bottom) by mikee lee... boy, that 2nd one's quite a beefy shot of me; them big thighs, tho, can squat over 200 lbs. i have the hernia scar to prove it.
we had a good set, i thought, both these nights. the more karling twirls & smiles, the better i know we're doing. i so enjoy watching her enjoy a set, as i do becky & all the others in the three bands i get to play in. (conversely, there's little worse than looking over @ at "bandmate" who's not getting it.) :) later the latter night, i picked up a friend & we went up to the mtns & it became my friend's last trip. friendships end, but music is everlasting. life is everlasting. maybe not mine or yours individually on this plane, but on an energetic, cellular, stardust, atomic, neutrino level, yes, we're no more transient than are the rocks or universes... *sigh*

laissez les bon temps roulet!!!!

how you, baybee? my mardi gras started from the couch (i'm always physically sober, but passed out around 4 am from sheer exhaustion, movie on being the generally not-worth-it-unless-you-like-feeling-slimy "dogtooth"). awoke to a phone call from my recuperating friend who once lived in new orleans & now look out on "my" mountains as visiting cat friend happily grooms herself, perched on the window... am celebrating this last-hurrah before lent w/a pot of community coffee & wonderful nola sounds such as these, both so, so thrilling (particularly the unison singing at end of "i'm gone"!), & all i can think of as i listen is warmth, friendship, smiles, affection, happiness, romance, travel, cool music, love... dang!
cat just jumped on the keyboard! "kitten on the keys"! :) she's reminding me to stop being mushy, maybe...
fabi dean's right that it'd be better to be at mardi gras today, but, as we discussed yesterday at breakfast at affordable, delicious cafe casse croute, it's great to be anyplace...
yes, we're not pushing up daisies... surely that's something to be happy about!
a smile on this mug, i wish you a lovely day. :) :) :)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, where is you?

can't sleep. clowns won't eat me, just can't sleep. man, life's been busy!
some thoughts:
1) a certain rather full-of-himself rockabilly hipster -- really, anyone w/good sense -- should not plomp smugly down & start putting the movidas on rockabilly betties right after departing a bar crapper, accompanied by the waft of his own poop (pepe le pew is cute to us viewers, but he not only never gets the girl, but repulses her!); yes, i feel sorry for him, too, that this happened, but not that sorry! really: get a clue, fella!
2) road trips can be wonderful; hotels & diners are fun; gigs are gigs, some terrific, some good, some horrid; friends (amazingly) ever-grow in number & run true & deep; but the freeways of LA & orange county certainly reside in a lower circle of hell, & there's no place like home (lisa p reminded me to click my ruby slippers 3x when reciting that)...
3) during this latest swell, fun, exciting, exhausting week/end, i got to play music w/a talented young man from up here on the mtn; w/karling & the atomics; & w/becky & my revenge friends, & eat at many great joints, most memorably a delicious anaheim french-vietnamese place. one of the best pts of traveling always is when i can drop in at my gym at some new place, but today i exercised so hard, i was reminded i'm probably getting a little long in the tooth to be kicking, squatting, punching, & burpying alongside the lithe 20-somethings... but MAN, it's fun! (not to mention the ego high of being able to keep up & even best many of them strength-wise);
4) then i read in runners' world about a 100-yr old marathoner (his time, 8:11; his training tip, "i watch where i am going") & remember if you don't use it, you lose it (feels like rigor mortis sets in when i skip working out for more than 2-3 days)... still, modification of form is in order to avoid the injuries that so commonly beset us middle-ageds. i need to ramp it down before i hurt myself AGAIN;
5) each of us have our opinions, & we live in a society that allows us the luxury of self-expression (refer to recent "louie" episode to laugh ruefully at us americans, so, so spoiled, relative to most everyplace else on earth). one of my fervent opinions (in the "who gives a crap" dept), for instance, is that men w/receding hairlines, extra girth, & strong hands are hot stuff. it's a face thing, too: angie & i were raised w/the most handsome father in the world, & unfortunately, we think therefore that handsome=solicitous & kind, since our father is, & "handsome but not soliticous & kind" men are not appropriately honoring their god-given gift of handsomeness & therefore, in my primitive book, are evil & to be punished (yikes! hope my attitude is softening as i age)... anyways, back to the pt: it's all relative!
a guy i know whom i find to be quite attractive flattered the crap out of me & told me, "you're so pretty," to which i replied, w/o thinking, "to YOU," & he shot back, "well, who else matters, dumbbell???" & i had to pause. yes, he was the one complimenting me... who else's opinion DID matter in that moment? and who was i to denigrate his kindness like that? i cannot deem his opinion to be wrong, even if i think i'd be prettier if i were taller, slimmer, younger, more anglo, more glamorous, whatever...
beauty is in the eye of the beholder. i must not insult the beholder, nor question his/her motives or sincerity... such things, yes, can't help but be broadly societal, but really are very personal, special, idiosyncratic, even sacred... i like what i like. you like what you like. we mustn't tell each other what to like or dislike. it's just disrespectful!
6) lastly, synchronicity just smacked me upside the melon. a friend asked what i thought of his new band's name. ignorant of the historical, local phrase he had chosen, i suggested other, similar names, thinking the name he'd picked sounded like a kids' band. i'm so smart. (didn't even think to look it up. what a scholar i am.)
yesterday as she drove w/me partway to the doll hut gig, cattie ness (aka "beaky") out of the blue starts telling me a story about the migrant workers in this valley, the ones who followed the harvests, naming them by the very phrase that will be my friend's band's name.
clonk! all of a sudden, it made sense: americana & bakersfield fetishists will go ape over this obscure reference. olen, i was ignorant when you kindly emailed me. you're a genius!

your blinded hand (tennessee williams)

Suppose that
everything that greens and grows
should blacken in one moment, flower and branch.
I think that I would find your blinded hand.
Suppose that your cry and mine were lost among numberless cries
in a city of fire when the earth is afire,
I must still believe that somehow I would find your blinded hand.
Through flames everywhere
consuming earth and air
I must believe that somehow, if only one moment were offered,
I would
find your hand.
I know as, of course, you know
the immeasurable wilderness that would exist
in the moment of fire.
But I would hear your cry and you’d hear mine and each of us
would find
the other’s hand.
We know
that it might not be so.
But for this quiet moment, if only for this
moment,
And against all reason,
let us believe, and believe in our hearts,
that somehow it would be so.
I’d hear your cry, you mine –

And each of us would find a blinded hand.