Showing posts with label karling and the atomics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label karling and the atomics. Show all posts

Monday, October 08, 2012

there can be no veil for this...

- so i won't write about it. cept in my journal, that is. actually, i can't adequately write about it... too amazing. seemingly. at this moment. who knows what tomorrow'll bring. my life has become wondrous in a way i never thought it could. was trying hard to resist, but when i let go... well, i wish all well.
- but in another vein, yesterday i got to go hiking w/two new friends & one i've known for 20 yrs, tho not well, andy noise, who had a record store in bk forever... what a nice experience! andy heads the bakersfield distance project & i'm hoping to work w/him as my at-least part time trainer to prep for my 45-mile birthday walk... the day was really swell & the scenery beautiful, but unfortunately i filled my camelback bag too hurriedly (they pulled up & i was still watching howlin wolf videos online -- eep!), & the sucker leaked all over me for the entire hike, all the way up to the summit of mt pinos, along sawtooth pass, for a good 3 hrs, & a cold snap had hit... so that combined w/happily, crazily burning the candle at both ends this past wk has put me in a sick bed...
- got to watch, tho, the coolest max fleischer cartoons, betty boops featuring louis armstrong & cab calloway, & eat the last pretzels in this house w/pb packets mama bought me for france, but which i didn't take...
(- so much i write on here is veiled... hope it's not too annoying for you who read... i always try to remember that my experiences are universal cause we're all pink meat & white bone underneath, to paraphrase carl perkins -- nothing i do is novel, really...) anyways, here's some unobfuscated stuff:
- today at 530, boxcar 7, a band recommended by ed boswell, will play for free at the pine mountain club clubhouse (actually, out on the lawn). bartending will be dusk devils robbie! i don't know if anyone on earth from the mountain will see this in time, but if too late, know there are music events & robbie drinks going on up at the PMC clubhouse all the time...
- tomorrow, sunday, is a rockabilly bbq in santa clarita, ca. dusk devils are on at 530 pm, karling & the atomics at 930 pm... it should be swell fun! here's the flyer:

ribbit... yawn... blablablablablablablablablablablabla

- (excessive 1st person pronoun alert... dang it, it's my blog! why do i apologize? good grief. oh well.)
- life's hopping, tho activity's been slow here on the blablablog... a frog in my throat since last saturday, i sang my pipes out completely at our DD/karling & atomics show in sta clarita, afterward collapsing into total sicky land. (word around bakersfield, which ALWAYS is the word around bakersfield, btw: "there's something nasty going around...") been pretty miserable, worsening things by continuing to try to gallivant as well as show up for family, telling friends since it's just physical sickness, i can handle it -- a wan joke... shoulda seen it coming, tho, & been smarter: been hitting it too hard. then there was the cold (tho fun) 6.5 mile hike led by andy noise/exploding water bag (read beblablablablalow)... dang, why is common sense so elusive? must get some payoff, as must all who may be intelligent, but aren't too dang smart, literally in my case not smart enough to come in out of the rain (well, water)... back to sta clarita, i've never done a show so laryngitically: ouch, it hurt intensely!! so like at our last show at trout's (bassless), i figured we better just attack that sucker & rock it extra super-hard!! i found out that robbie's stage presence is as cool-solid as stevo's is winning as well as that people still seem to love dusk devils & tell me kind, flattering things, even when i have no voice, & that a rockabilly-punk band called inazuma, who played clean-up that night, are my favorite japanese band since guitar wolf... wow! those guys were super-cool & rockin!!! they really capped the whole eve for me & made it one of the funnest gigs i've had in some time, ill health included. it was so swell to hear & watch them grind out "shakin all over" as kids & oldsters bounced off one another in a slampit... haven't seen anything like that in quite some time!
- being sick all wk i've had to realize how much i miss & get a kick out of my silly, neotenic voicet; it was reduced to a scratch, then a bark, then a nothing, then a whisper, then a drag queen, then waylon flower's madam, marge simpson, fran drescher w/o the honk, & finally, finally it's about 80% back, tho i still can't sing too well & still have a lot of throat/ear/eye pain...the impulse to just shout it out is near-overwhelming. i can't recall so, so wanting to sing! i guess the sentiment that "you always want what you can't have" extends beyond "love"... i've had two chances to play music this wk w/others & one i absolutely could not resist, so through the glass shards piercing my ears & throat, sang i did, realizing tho my range is significantly reduced, were i to have to continue like this, i could evolve into a shout singer cause there can be no fear: a person's got no choice but to belt it out good!!
- went to a few music shows to see my wild bluesman friend james blast the concrete off the barroom floor like he always does, feeling unusually shocked & amazed by his & his band's charisma, tightness, musical prowess/knowledge, & sorcerer-like power, whipping the crowd up in a wave of musical frenzy & catharsis ("a dionysian!" exclaimed my artist friend, her eyes lighting up w/joy, when i told her how he blows each solo & belts out each song as if it could be his last, w/such commitment to performance, any human unmoved, or rather, un-entranced, would have to be one incapable of emotion or in heavy denial)... so i showed up & was so surprised & flattered (& slightly embarrassed) to be greeted as if it were MY show, too!, w/people asking left & right when DDs were gonna play & how much they love ME (me??)... i tell you, who could've envisioned this kind of response from folks? i can only be dazed & grateful & try to appreciate it while i'm here, at this time in my life, doing it... i especially love that i get such kind attention from other women... anyways, back to the voice, a gal singer at one show told me she ruined hers for YEARS not resting it during laryngitis, even had to have surgery on her vocal cords. that should scare me, & it did momentarily, but my monkey don't listen & also has a short attn span.
- i hope i don't pay dearly for this some day... :(
- dang, how many times in life, in how many situations, have i (you, too, maybe?) "vaguely sensed," as it says in the big book, "i was not being any too smart," then ignored the little voice (not the monkey; monkey usually is the "big voice," unfortunately) & went full-steam ahead into whatever foolishness loomed? the big book also says, "common sense will... become uncommon sense." ha! when? well, only when i'm willing to take some right action! -- not when i'm running around w/pockets full of cash & no commitments except to play music & hang out w/loved ones. talk about a spoiled life i'm having right now!... merde... i shudder now, tho, realizing that the only way i've ever cleaned up my ways is thru some calamity/nightmare/travesty or other... unless i want the bad monkey to hog the cage, & indeed, crap all over & eventually ruin it, i need to be back in service.
- dang it!! i used to tell students one of the main benefits of writing is it helps them figure stuff out... this just was proved to me again.
- after all, as a friend so in-eloquently but truthfully stated, "i'm too old for this sh*t" -- that is, too old to be on tears that, tho clean & sober in my case, involve too-long hours, not enough sleep, performing w/hysterical, sometimes near-berserk exuberance, then shouting & having ears screamed into in order to "chat" in crowded bars & nightclubs... & then there are the cigarettes. i don't have the nicotine jones like my dear ex-hubby or wbj do, thank the great pumpkin, but i do have a thing for greens, finding them strangely sensual. i dunno. do "loves" ever make sense intellectually? at least immediately? not for me... those dang cool menthol death sticks: they're like that bad, bad good-looking man...
- so anyways, i sits here in the wee hours of morn & should be in the sack, but now that i'm finally starting to feel better, am hoping maybe to roll up on another creative wave, even if it's a just a mini-one, just ride it a little ways before being dumped back on the shores of mundanity (not sickness again, tho, please, no)...
- oh gosh, how boring has this post become? bleh. love to all. something deeper, more intellectual, more creative, more entertaining next time, maybe... for now, another dumb blablabla now draws to its close.

blablablablablablablablablablablabla, music, men, freed to grow up, who cares, my blog, mwahahahah

- water's running down the stream again: i've been writing songs, averaging 1 decent one/wk lately! recently i reworked one called "tarzan" i'd written for my old guitar player phil but now realize better explains where i'm at these days, tho w/"artistic license," of course... no song's a straight-arrow truth; that's part of the fun of writing them: freedom to play w/reality. anyways, i hope we do it in dusk devils: we'll see!
- how are you? in addition to frequent travel & practice & gigs, lately i've been experiencing the most happy semi-retired bum days, enjoying the breezes up here on the mountain, listening to the wind chimes, gazing at the birds & trees, enjoying visits from vagabond kitty & black-dog buford (traveling neighborhood animals content to plop down @ my pad for a bit, then move on), writing songs, writing journal, playing piano, taking the BRAT out for a little 4-wheeling (haha!), reading, going to meetings, hiking, supping w/friends, doing yoga, enjoying summer foods & coffee, cleaning house (i love keeping my house clean w/the exception of doing dishes, which i hate w/passion!)... don't see how life could be any better, really, as it stands. :)
- ... just spoke to ronnie mack & DDs will be doing the buddy holly/patsy cline barndance in september. yay!! thursday's a radio show w/karling in bakersfield & friday's a gig w/DDs and KA at b ryder's (flyer someplace; i'll try to post it here)... like i said, life is just singing these days. don't wanna think too much about possibly why that would be; will just feel fortunate & hope that your life, too, sings! :)
- i tend to be an emotional chickensh*t where the tough stuff's concerned, but at mama's behest, i gave news of a huge life-change to my ex-husband & -beau the other day. it was tough for me cause i'm not used to being straight w/people when i know it'll potentially make them uncomfortable/sad; i want to smooth everything over, make everyone ok, not look like the bad guy (that last one's probably the real truth). this means i'll lie & fudge in the moment, which only temporarily soothes situations & also ultimately makes me feel like a weasel... however, now w/all in open, i feel freer! it's premature to say, but i might be on the road to growing up (it's about time!!), forging a big, friendly, powerful pact w/a human who seems to want the same. whatever happens, i know the situation i'm in right now is healing, already having brought me much self-revelation &, maybe for us both ultimately, personality integration, at least as much as possible... (middle-class, american, semi-retired: i'm reminded of george carlin's quote. "some people see things that are and ask, why? some people dream of things that never were and ask, why not? some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.") anyways, i'm not gonna feel guilty that i have the luxury of time to write about all this -- will just feel grateful. i mean, just to feel understood in "that way" right now is quite a blessing... wow! someone understands me, all of me, & wants to learn more, & doesn't want to change me, nor me, him? unprecedented.
- after speaking to one of the exes, & last nite as i wallowed for a bit in longing & loneliness (briefly, tho, cause my friend called & snapped me out of it), i started thinking about the power & delusion of fantasy life. in real life, it will happen when one person idealizes the other in her/his absence; the reality can never compare. in my case, until i found booze (allowing me to then find bad men), i lived, luxuriated, sequestered myself in fantasy, being obsessed w/famous people... & i still will do it when i am lonely, musing about "if only" or just looking at pictures of, for instance, johnny weismuller or some other incredibly attractive famous male... it was & is like that "mitote" spoken of in that book "the four agreements," an evil fog, really, so much safer than dealing w/real people, especially real boys/men, but keeping me from growing emotionally, keeping me from really living & loving!
- even w/the vision of a mole, i was quite an artistic young person, so i'd gaze, pine, just zone out looking at famous men's faces, spending countless hours drawing them, listening to their music, imagining being w/them, them holding me, kissing me, saving me like knight in shining armor (if our dad's reading this, he probably just vomited. sorry, dad! even being brought up in the gia intellectual tradition, i drank just enough of society's koolaid to be sickened, apparently!)... since, i've been in real-life relationships that were extensions of that youthful delusion. i have "loved" musicians, actors, handsome men, brilliant men, lonely tho bigger-than-life types. i worshiped them as objects, then vilified them. i picked emotionally/geographically unavailable men, dreaming of that someday when they would do what i want, act the way "i know he can," fulfill my script, & then we'd live happily ever after. wow! pretty immature, huh? of course, then the relationships would suck, my "love" for them being conditional. the one i had that went the best, my marriage, went well enough, but there were secrets & sadnesses, tho we today are dear, loving friends...
- what i'm entering into now is no game, no contest, no cover-up, but a triple-L event. i'm not having to manipulate to try to ferret out attentions, nor flirt w/others or reciprocate their interests to fill up the hole in my soul, nor wonder: is he thinking of me? does he love me? does he have my best interest in mind? and i care about his well-being. that one is huge. i've usually felt, shameful to admit, every man for himself. selfish fear makes people do weird things, doesn't it? my dear ex, when we made amends, asked me to be kinder to men. well, b is easy to be kind to -- but w/this person of whom i write now, our shared feelings are humanizing me, softening & making more generous my attitude toward men in general... i feel safe. i know he won't calculatedly ambush me. and i know, cause it's already happened, if we have a wreck, we'll fix it together. he's not gonna just abandon me, bloodied by the roadside, nor will i, him.... heck! if this continues, i'll be a genuinely good human being, able to treat all persons as persons instead of puppets! :)
- if anyone on earth has reason to be a victim, a bad monster, ruined by what life's handed him, it's this human. instead, he's a success, a wiseguy, a smarta*s, a friend, a kind, funny, sage, talented, brave, fiercely intelligent survivor, & together we've started making lemonade from lemons, or as aunty rita has said is impossible, chicken salad from chicken sh*t...
- i've blabbed far too much already... in summation, were this to end today, i'd be destroyed likely for quite some time, but in the end i'd have to be thankful cause it's unprecedented, magical, & changing me for the better. it may be what people throughout the ages have called true love.
- do you relate to any of this? i hope that you do. and i hope that you feel it, too. wish me luck. may you have it, as well.

happy independence day!!! and it's a big music weekend for dusk devils, karling & the atomics, more!


today is july 4, an especially important day for me (see below) as well, of course, on a much, much larger scale, the united states of america... may we all be freed today of whatever oppresses us, be it physical, spiritual, or elsewise. a special prayer, thought, intention, too, for dear loved ones who are in pain. i fervently, sincerely wish them return to good health & strength as quickly as possible... as i know many more of you are experiencing, too, tho life may be wonderful, it hurts to see loved ones suffer... i pray that i'll be ready to help however possible, whenever asked.
meanwhile, in the fun & frivolous dept (tho sunday's a benefit for a kind friend), this weekend:

mwahahahahahahahahaaaa!!!!


Wednesday, June 20, 2012

rockabilly jamboree this friday in bakersfield!

downbeat will be 9 pm with DUSK DEVILS!!!! we're gonna rocknroll all night... everything's all right :)i will give you my dusk devils guarantee i will do my earthly best to put on the best show i can!
as for karling, she's not just beautiful, but super-talented & a great songwriter & also very kind... i know you'll love her set, too! my eyes are only just a tad brown, saying that. i am so happy to back her, truly! :)
as for the other fellows, well, they look like they could possibly blow the doors off the joint. don't miss it, if you can!

Tuesday, April 03, 2012

blablablablablablablablabla, but not at all "blah"

how are you? i am well. now, since on a blog, one writes about one's life/etc, how to describe the last many days? will try.
had fast, smooth ride out to donna's; feeling naturally wired lately seems to make time pass quickly & entertainingly, tho at worst, i am confused & discombobulated due to inability to organize... got to my friend's & we leaped on ea other w/happiness & headed to denny's, where i was rewarded by one of her spontaneously slapstick moments when she somehow stuck the soda straw in her eye... donna can be quite serious & intense, but i also have had some of the funniest moments ever w/her, face hurting from all the laughing we do (actually, another friend of mine, now that i think of it, much reminds me of this; i'd been prepared for him to gig me on april fool's day, convinced he could NEVER do it for a 3rd yr in a row, but dang if he didn't!!)... friends now 20 yrs, donna & i caught up; when i told her about my crazy fun peripatetic life these days, she commented, "everyone wants a piece of jenny. you're popular!" zoinks! i laughed out loud; me? popular? wow!! whether it's true or not don't matter; i was delighted & shocked to hear this - me, who used to cry when teacher'd call on me. :) how life can change people, if we stay open to it, huh? :) i think the comment speaks as much, tho, for my friend's generosity, to compliment me that way :) ... next a.m. brought SPECTACULAR fun running the claremont "mills," this wilderness running/biking course up & down tall mtn paths; oh! what a wonderful time that was! i wish i had places like that, well-traveled, well-defined paths overlooking nature, that i could visit every day... here is all wilderness, of course, but the defined runs are along the stinky highway, or only a mile or so... anyways, onward:
(was just outside & vagabond kitty, who comes to visit, then is on her merry way for another adventure, was sniffing my truck bumper. i wonder what it smelled like that caught her nose?)
ok, we went thrifting & yardsaling, as is donna's & my bargain-hunting m.o., & just after i told my friend i was looking for yard art, an awesome statue appeared at one yardsale, this cambodian or chinese or some east-asian figurine, for THREE BUCKS!!! "wow," said i, "some folks would say we manifested our reality just now." she replied matter-of-factedly, "i always do..." hmmm... she does have the most impeccably decorated house, all super-thrift, but all super elegant-looking, too, truly!, & i've noticed she'll say, for instance, "i think i'm going to change my color scheme to tans," then we'll go out & dang if she doesn't find a whole bunch of linens & decorative stuff in tans for dirt cheap! she got me a lovely skirt that i will wear to france... taking it on train tomorrow to show to becky, who's leading our tour of la belle france (have i mentioned this here? dunno...) & hope she approves. becky wants us to look "elegant" for the blue monday rockabilly fest we're playing. "elegant" is NOT my strong point. i hope i'll get up to snuff...
on a whim, donna said yes, she'd like to go listen to music, so we embarked on a madcap drive on the freeways of lost angeles & wound up in a dark, smoky blues club packed w/revelers & bluesmen & impeccably taut & sexy burlesque dancers... i kept wanting to leave, once i'd heard the acoustic, old-timey wingnut set i was interested in, but she was enjoying the music, so i left her at the barstool & spent much of the eve outside looking for stars in the cloudy sky & smoking, tho i usually don't, & met a fun, crazy gal who told me she makes her boyfriend's stage suits (how cool is THAT?) & riffing & jumping & promenading around w/mad others, then we headed home & got completely lost, but it had to be funny in the end. we must've driven 50 extra miles getting home!! next day we went to the pomona arts colony, where they were having a flea market. yesss!!!!! i got a tiny strutting baby figurine that might be quite old, judging by his little outfit, plus a tiny old-time radio figurine, each for a quarter from a nice old man, & some pretty dresses, one i hope will work for france... i hit the road for points south to, i thought, listen to more music, but my friend who was having the show, i later learned, got hurt & was m.i.a. for the eve. still, oblivious to the extent of things, i ultimately had sufficient fun, walking around a beach town & having a juice & then some miso soup & then some apples & bananas, then, feeling all healthy, a cigarette, & that night saw bridesmaids & a cool cartoon show called "adventure time" & had a pleasant-enough, nice breather... next morning i headed to big's in fullerton for rehearsal w/karling & the atomics in the joint's small conference rm; all were gathered at the table, maybe nursing hangovers, & i got a free plate of grub from the buffet (good stuff!) & we all waited for brian paxton to get there from bakersfield, then set up & had a nice rehearsal... karling has quite a strong, street-corner voice, i think, when she goes unmiked. cool! my old friend manuel (big manny) couldn't make it cause he was recuperating from knee surgery, but i had a nice talk w/him while waiting & will see him on may 7 for the special "gene & eddie" barndance at joe's in burbank... yay!... the opening band, high energy, did some songs we do in dusk devils, like mercy (last week's openers, dead zed's choppers, a band i enjoyed, do blue moon baby), then handsome young michael walley came up & did some bagpipe tunes, like he'd done last week in lompoc, tho sans his kilted garb, & the vibe of the joint immediately went into a sort of mysterious reverie & even reverence when the first drones sounded... then we went up & i got to play facing a table of the cutest little girls! from harsh experience, i know i always, always need to bring my amp (never again will i go thru the house; that just sets me up to have bad sound), so since i could hear, i was able to play some stuff that had me thinking, wow! where's this coming from? it was too cool... the set went really well; karling twirled & twirled, which is always a good sign, & anthony redhorse, guest on doghouse bass, filled in very musically. i thought we sounded really tight, & karling said afterward people told her her band's never sounded so good! :) soundman tim maag, he of the punk rock lineage & sly bedroom eyes, complimented me highly on harmonies & playing. "i soloed you on the buck owens songs," he said. "you sounded really great! like buck owens!" i got some dough, then snuck out to see if my injured friend was ok. if he wasn't gonna be at his sunday jam up in whittier, i would head to echo park to see my stepson & his gal, the latter whom i'd not yet met, & then be able to get home a day earlier. i pulled up to the frog pond & walked on in to compliments from a handsome biker! wow!, & there was my friend, looking ashen & kinda banged up, but vertical... he came over wild-eyed & said, "you got your keys?" i said yes, we went & grabbed them, & i got to play more music w/him & his guitarist, even! wow! these are well-known, accomplished, & beloved musicians... it was so swell! again, having my amp right there, i could play what my mind heard for the most part, & on a lot of it i tried to stick to horn-like stabs, since already there were two guitars on the stage, tho i did rip out some solos they threw me, & some sounded ok-enough, i must say!... they wanted me to sing, but all i could come up w/was "my babe." after, my friend said it hurt to sing cause of his injury & dang, if i'd known that, i would've tried harder to think of more bluesy songs! as-was, others came up & sang & it was fun to back them, see the enjoyment in their faces as they vocalized... the coolest part of this stint was when one little gal was singing & this biker chick to my side lit the cigarette i'd been goofing w/& i smoked & played piano & looked around & people were laughing! my friend, who was watching, later said, "you're really funny. you're like a comic. people dig you a lot!" that was the best of all... also, several people came up at both gigs & quizzed me on how long i'd been playing piano & complimented my technique. one big samoan-looking fellow, who turns out had mutual friends, said, "yeah, i told myself, 'she knows what she's doing; it's just natural to you, you can tell'," & tim maag had said some amazing things, like that i had "economy of energy & motion." wow!! life can be strangely wonderful, don't you think?
i hung out a bit, then hit the road for echo park & greeted my stepson at his bitchin pad off glendale blvd. he had to get to bed for work, & so next morning i got to explore old, hilly, seedy, beautiful, urban but leafy echo park for the 1st time. loved climbing steep, steep streets, right there in los angeles, for pete's sake!; at one particularly cool, large old rock house, an elderly mexican lady in peasant-looking garb was sweeping her porch & as i passed her house, i spied her million-dollar view of los angeles! it made me happy that real folks had these amazing views, not just rich folks... cody's girlfriend kate, a brilliant, science-minded, sweet girl, told me that's what in-part attracted them to the neighborhood, that it was such a mixture socioeconomically & racially... before actually meeting kate, i found her a beautiful blue sparkly dress i thought would look nice on her, & which i was so happy that she loved!, & him a shocking t-shirt w/graphic of gorgeous mummy-woman at out of the closet's $1 rack, plus a t-shirt i'll wear today at practice that announces, "i just don't listen." because it's true. i'm not sure why i don't listen. but i don't... stepson has taken a long time to meet someone to love, but now he has, & they have a lovely life together, i can tell, in the coolest condo overlooking echo park itself & the gorgeous LA skyline, & i'm so happy for him. :) little cody, happy at last. :) everyone deserves to be happy, i say!!
cody treated us to soup plantation, then i hugged them goodbye & hit the road. like always, as soon as i spotted my mountain town, all my stress fell off & i just sighed a big "aaaaaahhhh"... in my house, i felt peace & calm, a different kind of happiness. it had been such a great trip, but how nice it is to be home, lovely, sweet home. :)
if you're still reading, i thank you for your intrepidness, & hope you'll comment. carpe diem, friends. carpe diem! :)
time to pack up & go again! feliz dia, amigos!

Thursday, March 01, 2012

"i need a man, i need a man, i need a man to love..."

both bands i play with tomorrow night @ narducci's in bakersfield feature in their sets the above barbara pittman rockabilly tune (actually called simply "i need a man," always evoking cracks from male band members when announced)... i hear this show, affiliated w/the big hot rod deal called the march meets, is going to be packed to the walls; i hope for a music-heavy eve & that my wardrobe change between bands (from punk-monsterbilly to my attempt at elegant) will be swift & successful.
- what fun it is to back karling & becky in their bands, karling & the atomics & cattie ness & the revenge, respectively... this wkend, too, will be dusk devils practice w/low-key but high-energy bassist & drummer who are locked in tight; the other night at practice when john leaned over & cued stevo, i about fell over cause i know that's what bassists & drummers are supposed to do (they are, as carl leyland reminded me, the rhythm SECTION), but i've never actually seen any bass-drum players in DDs work together like that... after the march 17 DD show, we'll practice w/another bassist, a rockabilly kinda cat w/great chops, w/hopes of always having a line-up ready to go, whatever show comes up... ok, that's all for now.

Monday, February 27, 2012

here i is, i is here (for now, that is)

photo by brian paxton (top), karling & the atomics (bottom) by mikee lee... boy, that 2nd one's quite a beefy shot of me; them big thighs, tho, can squat over 200 lbs. i have the hernia scar to prove it.
we had a good set, i thought, both these nights. the more karling twirls & smiles, the better i know we're doing. i so enjoy watching her enjoy a set, as i do becky & all the others in the three bands i get to play in. (conversely, there's little worse than looking over @ at "bandmate" who's not getting it.) :) later the latter night, i picked up a friend & we went up to the mtns & it became my friend's last trip. friendships end, but music is everlasting. life is everlasting. maybe not mine or yours individually on this plane, but on an energetic, cellular, stardust, atomic, neutrino level, yes, we're no more transient than are the rocks or universes... *sigh*