no, we ain't humpty dumpty: "fall down seven times, stand up eight")...

i think the latter's a chinese proverb, maybe of military or confucian origin (i flat don't know, in other words); the former i wrote cause i knew humpty dumpty for a few yrs, & yes, james & i have broken pieces, but we definitely are putting everything back together again, in fact, stronger than ever we could on our own (he says this is true, too, which is so cool: we're on the same page!)... well, our combined show this wkend (green flyer below)'s cancelled. yes, i had an accident & hurt myself; james says my nickname should be "lumpy"... i'm feeling better & know i'll be ok, tho was pretty concerned two days ago! stupid mortality! re the music, we'll do shows "at our leisure," he says, & tells me not to worry; my health is the most important thing, he says, which is true... can't play well, even if not sick, when anxious & bashed-up like i've been! we saw avengers the other day (one good scene, where hulk smashes loki) & then joked that the jenny superhero action figure would stand there & wring her hands & wail while the james one would detonate like hulk... it's still so refreshing to joke about the darkest sides of us, to acknowledge them & work together to overcome or maybe transmute them. :) ... here's his favorite pic of us; he says we look "buff," & it's really a great pic of him, i'll say. :) i don't feel too buff right now, but after my crash earlier this week, i do feel lucky & glad to not've gotten myself too bashed up physically or mentally... may you who read this be healthy & happy, or

at least one of the two, if you can't have both.

"hello" to jp + bang bang: great song, bad idea

hello.
thank you for continued interest in life. and i suppose me.
it's good to maintain a constant interest in life - one's own, others', the life process. good but elusive.
i bashed my noggin pretty badly yesterday, so we'll see where this writing goes -- here're some pix from this past wkend. cattie ness & the revenge: nice, fun-loving full of life, generous, laid-back comrades. becky, strong & beautiful, has created for herself a full artist's life which she kindly shares w/people like me. as you can see, the band pic came out well -- atractive folks, photogenic. however, from now on, i will groom myself for shows, & for life, for that matter, since when i don't, i feel like i'm in drag, an impostor, a midget. becky'd asked the band for an elegant look -- you can see that she (& fabi) are gorgeously coiffed -- mentioning "audrey hepburn." sighing w/doom, i realized i can't even see "audrey hepburn" from here... but "lon chaney"? yes, that look's possible, as you can see from hotel photo of my texting marathon w/fellow monster... ah! society breeding discontent & desperation (damned freud!)... ah! unstructured life condemning soul to sloth & madness (i pray temporarily)... this reminds me, tho, that i glimpsed another kindred spirit in dex romweber when skimming his CD dedication to both st cecilia & chaney & wonder if he's better-reconciled the monstrous & ecstatic impulses, a life of fun & bliss blackened by the hole of heartache & oblivion. thought my fellow monster had it made, but he, too, confessed to sadness & brokenness. arrrgggh.
will there be fun & fulfillment again before this pop stand blows? can we write out a syllogism? what would the fringe physicists say? certainly someplace there are different versions of you & me & everyone we know, & some of them gotta be consistently happy. quantum mechanics thusly alleviates, @ least for this parsec, bleakness & self-pity... w/that, let's toss the gloom & wish happy rapture-that-never-came to all. we're all still breathing, for pete's sake! lastly i must thank a person i know for ratting the demon out so that he didn't have to try to contain her all alone & so she could live another day & maybe get a dang exorcism once & for all. as for mr & mrs gia, there are seats in heaven for them both, & no words can tell how much i love them. bravery to do what the soul calls -- i've had it; i've been there; i seek it again. may your path today be clearly-guided, gentle & brave.