geez louise. bettie page is gone.

- was posting manuel's xmas shows (tomorrow at the game in temple city; go to www.myspace.com/bigmannyband to see) & chuckling w/him excitedly about the record when i read that bettie page died. :( 85 yrs old. (not young; she had a heckuva hard life: abuse, pinup yrs, holy roller, insanity - tho in her last photo, at age 80, she looked great!) she made the rest of us women look like little men, i think. considering she's a patrician blonde, gretchen mol did a pretty darn good job as bettie in "the notorious bettie page," getting her spirit (i suppose), but gretchen mol, too, looked like a little man compared to the real bettie.
- she exercised daily before most women did. she had the most perfect, lovely figure (revealed most beautifully in bunny yeager's shots) & bewitching features. i saw color film footage of her once & she was indigenous-brown. she was a teacher for a while. she didn't drink or smoke, which gave me hope when my life was very dark. later in life, she struggled big time w/mental illness. (i did too before i stopped drinking, tho i never stabbed anyone. bettie did.)
- i think if i hadn't had to clean my life up, i'd've been one of these rockabilly gals steeped in bettie-worship, who blackens & rolls her hair just like bettie, dresses just like her, drives herself bonkers being in love w/"being" bettie, but i did, so i don't. plus who am i kidding??
- she was more magical than 500 of her impostores. none can come even close because soul, which bettie had, is organic & free-flowing & imitation is studied & ironic, the opposite of soul. in black & white, she was the sweetest angel, the naughtiest devil, the mightiest queen, & everything in between. the wanna-betties (that sounds harsh; what's a better name?) can't imitate that amazing quality because it was spontaneous & authentic; like elvis impersonators, they can only ape. oo-oo-oo!
- but heck, i guess it's cooler to ape bettie than say... heck, most anyone else. so don't mean to sound unnecessarily harsh, but i think the point is, why ape at all? there'll only ever & always be one bettie page, & now she's gone. so just be yourself!... whatever THAT means!!
- row row row your boat, c'est la vie, memento mori... forry, bettie, the evidence keeps building. i guess ain't none of us getting out alive, so go have fun, friend, kick up your heels & go.

sufferin' succotash!!!! pipes of rusted gold sing away the bachelorette blues

p.s. (pre-script): read below about us dusk devils on the radio free bakersfield podcast this week!!
- today, day one of my bachelorette half-wk, the normally well-behaved (tho hyper) border collie chucked his toy hedgehog into the toilet & later peed on a guy's camp chair while the guy sat in it -- OUTSIDE the dog park (if the peeing had happened inside, all would have chuckled & blown it off). the other dog, not at all a neurotic brainiac, has been stat today - fat, dumb, & happy. :) my "noble savage" notion that the less-smart have it easier is reinforced -- it chaps my hide, yet too often seems to ring true, like that mars & venus doodoo...
- but in the wonderful vein, tonight i found an astounding singer!!! everyone in LA & true lovers of R&B rockabilly world-wide must know of her (i continue to be totally unhip): what a voice!! i post here in case you haven't heard her, or the others... for here she is, w/two others i just love:
- www.myspace.com/lilgizzelle -- GOOD LORD!!! LISTEN TO THIS GIRL (she's 22) SING!!!! her other myspace profile suggests her to be a normal young woman who likes normal young woman things (what i imagine they like, anyhow)... but blessed w/the voice of big mama thornton!!! i almost want to put my head in the oven, hearing her sing, to invert the motive of art fein's comment in this month's page o'his. what a gift this powerful sprite possesses!!
- www.myspace.com/sharonjonesandthedapkings -- by now, every music lover on earth knows about her, the female james brown (thank you, luann, for turning me on to her), this former prison guard who worked hard hard & long & now, in midlife, is huge thx to amy winehouse, who used sharon's band (but not sharon) for her "back to black" LP, indirectly drawing the public eye to sharon (i think AH is awesome, too, her billie-holliday-ronettes-russ-meyer-rockabilly-switchblade-sister-60s-soul image, her amazing songwriting & smoky vocals, tho her songs are so steeped in the addict lifestyle, it's painful for me to listen too closely -- what a talent, tho!!)
- www.myspace.com/candyekaneband -- the toughest girl alive just got home from south africa. what a sparkle she has, what chi, what chutzpah, & what a voice, from velvety to growl to all in between...
- neurotic genius dog, realizing his "dad's" still not here, is now on a barking tirade. meanwhile, texas bubba dog is sitting, smiling at me & drooling gently. dad? what dad? time to stop typing. (ps - i don't really have the blues. i just like alliteration.) :)

waaahoooo!!! nearly done!!! : birthing a behemoth

finally!!!!! i just completed a fairly large section of my thesis, the story appendix that accompanies the curriculum/study guide i'm writing... this sucker is a behemoth!!
tentative page counts:
main thesis - 67 pages
curriculum/study guide - 35 pages
education standards - 1 page
at a glance lesson planner - 4 pages
appendix one (leveled stories) - 81 pages
appendices 2-10 - 35 pages
and it's still not finished!!!! so far i have 223 pages!!! i've been a "high maintenance" student, maybe, worried about everything & wanting to do the best i can (which means i ask lots of Qs), but still the profs've been supportive, especially my lovely advisor dr. jo sanzgiri, who is kind, patient, organized, & enthusiastic, too!... this is an important project i've undertaken -- this is definitely no phone-it-in kinda work for me!! read the overview & please give feedback, if you wish... http://www.freewebs.com/learningwithsoul/index.htm