friendships! & having fun in backwardsfield...

the lady below has known james for decades, & when james & i became a couple, she was wholehearted in her support for us: "james has been my friend forever, and if he loves you, i love you, too!" she exclaimed, & she's proved it many times. in middle age, her life hit some serious rough patches after she suffered some huge personal losses; like any of us, she's no angel, but like the best of us, she has a big heart & is loyal & loving. she came to visit & we had a good time hanging out, tho she froze most of the time in the mountain climate. put on a coat! i kept grouching, but she wouldn't listen... so appropriate that our friend would be stubborn...
wanted to report on a few great experiences we had last week in backwardsfield. you should check em out when you're there:
1. driving in the country outside town, james told me, "i wanna go someplace where i can sample fruit & nuts!" our 1st stop was a locally-well-known grower/tourist attraction/fruit place off 58 on the way to tehachapi, a bust: the selection of fresh stuff was small (it IS winter, but...), the samples parsimoniously controlled by a woman who actually sneered when i said my dad grows citrus, too! the vibe of the place was not too friendly, our "okie pie" tasty but too expensive. next we headed for california fruit depot, which i've seen signs for for yrs but never visited. highly worthwhile! we walked in the small store to shelves of dried fruits & nuts, with samples of everything that you are trusted to sample on your own! in the back rm, i was able to squeeze my own fresh sample of orange juice. it was delicious, tho... not as good as dad's. :) a picture window looks out on the production line, with (all female, when we visited) workers quality-checking fruit tumbling out onto a conveyor belt, colorful boxes labeled for shipment to asia on the floor-level conveyor. we came out with orange creme almonds (they taste like torrones!), "frog balls" (a horrifyingly-named concoction which james & angie knew of & love!), & garlic chips, all weird & delicious treats. on top of this, the ppl who work there are nice, nice, nice! if you're anywhere near southeast bakersfield, you gotta go to this place! http://calfruitdepot.com
2. backwardsville is known for antique shopping, having write-ups in national magazines & newspapers. with the gias, we hit a 2-block length of 19th street downtown, starting off at the old woolworth's, now three stories of antiques. the highest floor, once a work/storage rm, we thought, was most interesting to me, w/its exposed 1930s-era ventilation system & doors hand-labeled from a time when big department stores ruled the land & had whole storage rooms just for candy. we found a whiteboy james-style army-issued black trenchcoat for very reasonable bill, then went to a place around the corner filled w/toys, comics & all the junk i wanted when i was a kid... james & i almost hyperventilated cause there was too much stuff for us to look at, but little of interest for mom & dad, so we resolved to return, just the two of us, or with the bennetts... the place of most note, for me, & that i want to hep you to, if you ain't hepped, was the merry-go-round antique mall. this pretty antique store has a funky treasure in its basement: a fake vintage movie theatre they seem to've built just for fun: behind yellow cages along the walls are a small lobby, classic movie posters, a ticket booth w/mannequin ticket seller, & a theatre screening an old picture & inhabited by a few dummy-patrons! in another room, a sign announces "pool use for hotel guests only" or something close, behind which are fake palms & sun shades to mimic a resort of old: such imagination & whimsy must be promoted, even if just on this little blablablog! here's a facebook link to the place so you can see it, too: merry-go-around antiques
(if you love military/work clothes, but also costumes! costumes! costumes!, another place you shouldn't miss is howard's workwear in the bakoland quarter of oildale. this is one of the best costume shops i've ever seen, as good as ones in san francisco & austin, i think, tho far darker, more cluttered, & less fancy! howard's workwear & costumes on facebook)

outside in & inside out, you're my meat... you're fat & forty, but lordy, you're my meat

heck, what they got away w/lyrically in the pre-no-holds-barred musical era!... for me, clever & humorous euphemism & metaphor's so much more fun than let-it-all-hang-out lyrics. to express salacious affection this way, w/a smile & a poke, is much more thrilling, i think, since comprehension's embedded w/delight & surprise. :)
the other night, nuts from the incessant, battering wind up here, i jumped in the truck & headed down for music in the southland (if my new dress fit, i would go; if it did not, i'd stay home & watch larry sanders to drown out the teeth-grinding wind), then tagged along to norm's for eggs & jam-slathered toast w/some bakersfield gals & friends, then checked in at a swell little motel off the long beach circle, a place i love but will keep to my greedy self cause it's cheap & vintagey & humble, but you can email me & i'll tell you about it... w/o the distraction of my ipod (which ran away last wk), i hit the bed by 4 am, which enabled me to next day hit the swap meet!! i found great treasures, best of which was a piano-shaped jewelry box, as well as an i-hope-appropriate gig dress & some juicy red & orange bell peppers & a girl scout shirt & some millet for my birds!! i drove around long beach for quite some time (cause i was lost) & found envy prickling me, as it does not when i go to other beach towns, but LB seems to have that desirable combo (for me) of funky & fun & pretty & rough... i just started to get an attitude, so sought comfort at one dollar bookstore in an old barnes & noble @ LB's pike shopping center, an overwhelming assembly, tons upon tons of tomes! my biggest score was a learn-japanese-using-manga title for my niece; there was a whole lotta junk, but for every $1 you spend, the bookstore donates a book to the local school district, which is a terrific idea! too bad more communities don't have this kind of place (one dollar bookstore locations)... obsessed w/locating a restaurant i'd read about, i drove & drove in long, long ovals & angles for an hr before resorting to old-time navigation: the thomas guide, which took me happily to a gigantic booth at king's hawaiian on w sepulveda near the 91/107, a wonderful place!! languid, swooning hawaiian tunes played as i gazed upon a giant aquarium & ate sweet rolls, rice, kim-chee, potato salad, & various juicy-sweet bbq... delicious! the place also has a lovely bakery w/cakes fecund w/fruits & creams, but i was about to bust, so headed for home, a fat smile on my face. http://www.kingshawaiianrestaurants.com/
then i hit the gaseous parking lot known as the 405.
the only good thing about the "drive," if you could call the interminable inching progress i made that, is it took so dang long, i hit my area in time to view the frazier mountain sunset filled w/sighing clouds out of maxfield parrish...
now the wind's still blowing... wonder what escape will present itself next?
a good day to you. may the wind not blow your skirt up.
unless you wish it to do so.

tweedly-deedly-dee, dee-dee-dee-dee...

(rest in peace, don cornelius of soul train. may your suffering have ended w/the pulling of that trigger & may your family have peace sooner than later. depression is a horrid monster. what a way to go.) :(
love the drum part on the song ref'd at top (rockin robin). used to clear out the cal state pub playing that, sea cruise, maybelline. anyone who didn't want to hear those songs should've left, anyhow, & fallen in a deep mudhole... the other day at practice w/karling, cesareo & i switched instrus on a run-thru of jackson; i was terrible, but it was fun. i love the punishing pain of trying to keep the kick drum going, or playing thru as muscles scream at a show; the way we play, esp in dusk devils, is kinda like going for a long jog.
well, the birds have been all over outside today, which is por quoi the original reference. crap - that reminds me i'm sposed to be studying french. going there in april w/becky & fabi to play music & tourist around; amazing! becky even sez i can open the tv show we're gonna do w/fats domino's "blue monday" since she says the studio has that same name...
mind seems to be hopping around a bit. am watching a show on the secrets of the pyramids. reading wonder woman as well as 100 volunteer vacations & 101 foods that will save your life & also rumi & jim thompson. applied to volunteer this summer at the gesundheit institute in WV, that clown hospital run by the great humanitarian doctor who "prostituted" himself to be subject of that maudlin robin wms movie to draw attn to his good cause... wonder if they'll accept me? wonder what tomorrow will bring? wonder wonder wonder wonder won: who wrote the book of love?
had a visitor yesterday & today. we drove in circles & ate at denny's (2-4-6-8 menu is cheaper than cooking, hate to say). i love having visitors. i love being home. i love being gone.
what's up with dusk devils? we've been sick, so will get some percussion personnel soon... gigs are upcoming w/karling & the atomics (KA & her "bakersfield band -- aren't they cute?" she said at last show & inside i winced cause i felt so uncute, but outside i grinned like a chipmunk) & w/becky (cattie ness & revenge) & w/dusk devils, even tho we are flying bassless for the moment... at big's the other night, we opened for big sandy, as i had w/becky the wk before in fresno; the set went well, wild & rowdy, as had the set the wk before w/revenge; KA & atomics practiced beforehand in the dining rm at big's & i almost wiped out the whole table of drinks hitting a volleyball that was for some reason in the rm; then i had a panic attack over my fat arms & karling so kindly cooed, "show me your arm," then, when i'd removed my sweater to show her the ham hock, "why, that's a perfectly nice arm; that's a fine arm," as if she were consoling a child, & in a moment of clarity i realized, stop being so gd self-centered!! this is her show!!! then karling added, "besides, you look like a crazy cat lady, wearing your sweater," but i'd already decided i'd ditch it... during the set, bsp got to sing "jackson" w/karling & i did some don rich on her buck owens songs, in keys so high, i felt i might flip inside out... afterward, cesareo told me about astrology & what'll work or not in my love life (drat!) & bsp & i watched big sandy for a while before hitting the road & then it was 5 am, then 5 pm & i was heading from bako to home in that post-show funk, so took the long way back along southern country roads & came upon a desolate long-abandoned oil company & explored & picked it as the sun set, accidentally disturbing a roosting white-faced owl & roadrunner in two separate bldgs (there were 8 buildings to explore!) & 3 cottontails, too, then i had to bail cause darkness fell, so i walked around the truck stops near the grapevine & by the time i got home, i felt really swell (... long phone call...) well, my friend & i just yakked for a long while, speculating about ancient technology & lamenting the burning of the alexandrian library & he told me about a book he read about joan of arc, sounds interesting, written in 1st person, even, & now i'm out of gas, hoping to catch the bus tomorrow morn cause i'm so sick of driving, so now it's time to watch more roku or read a bit more or hey, here's a novel idea: go to bed. :)
hope you're well, if you've read this far. :) xoxoxoxo

haaaaaaaaaapppy new year!!! and blablablablabla

- don't wanna write, so i will. 1st of all, here's a wonderful, wonderful song i found thru fb monster grottu orloff as well as pic of me from lisa paxton.
- now the enchilada: spent a few days between gigs down in north san diego county w/the mcgraws, generous, friendly, well-adjusted program friends whom i love so much... 1st pt of the visit was w/handsome bill as freddy worked. he created a breakfast item he dubbed "oatmeal jenny." delicious! 2nd half of visit i spent w/freddy @ swell women's mtg... after i'd left, they sent a characteristic msg: "the girls [their dear little dogs] want to know where that bettie page gal went." what a sweet visit i got to have, & how lucky i am to know so many good ppl these days!
- met tim maag @ wed's show w/cattie ness & revenge at big's, fullerton. tim was bassist for cramps, D.I., social distortion, alice bag band. punk royalty! he was running sound & said after that i have "chops" & wants me to record some "60s-style" organ pts w/a band i can't remember name of... i was really flattered. becky & all looked fantastic! adam played so loudly, however, all i heard was cacaphony... the audience seemed to enjoy, tho, & that's all that's important. after, i got to crash in becky & john's rm when adam took off w/his bro; becky woke up @ dawn's crack, as she always does, turning on lights & talking away as she always does. it's so annoying, it's kinda cute -- she's like the innocent, oblivious little girl waking up early on sat morn to watch cartoons, & everybody needs to wake up RIGHT NOW to watch them, too! :)
- tim maag was again @ new year's show @ big's -- this time i played w/karling abbeygate, as did bsp & aj & donnie... drummer was john "bermuda" schwartz, who's weird al's drummer & a real gentleman. we had a rocking, smoking set, having warmed up earlier @ aj's sis's house. that family has the nicest, cutest kids; homeschooled by mom, they interact politely & intelligently w/adults. unusual! it was a continuing delight to look over & see those little ones dancing & smiling, then coming over to ask questions about the piano, or just ask if i needed anything (wow!).... aj's family in general impress me as highly attractive young ppl who also are decent & nice. i continually these days meet young ppl (heck, each day, more & more ppl are young, compared to me!) who seem to have it together as decent humans & remind me fleetingly of what a mess i was... nice to know these days i get to evolve, thru not drinking but mostly thru not dying, into a decent sort w/friends. but still... how do these young ppl do it? how do people just seem to KNOW how to be attractive, generous, kind, hard-working? it's a lovely thing to meet these types. it warms my cockles. :)
- yes, i like being a sideman, & i like that karling wants me to look "edgier." for sat's show, for instance, she said i should wear my "zombie makeup," so i was delighted to be able to lay it on thick. (the paxtons let me crash their fancy hotel rm to gussy up -- thank you!!) in face paint & short dress, i DID feel a lot more comfy than when i'm trying to look like a more traditional female... que lastima. i was so wrecked in childhood, wanting to be dad... or was i? karling, who masks a sharp & incisive mind behind a coy, heart-faced pinup image, says no, i'm just artistic. another friend says, "you gotta be you." wanda jackson told me, "you gotta make it your own, honey." remember the oracle at delphi. remember what happened to all those bands that tried to become what the record companies wanted them to be... i mean, quien sabe? just know i feel more comfortable being part-monster. a nice monster, like hermann munster, that is. or, in less-nice moments, maybe wednesday addams...
- being a sideman's exciting cause i'm able to concentrate more on just the piano, tho art fein's disappointed i'm not singing w/either becky's or karling's line-ups. (when i told him bsp & i're subbing in w/karling's band, he generously commented, "wow! that must be a powerhouse line-up!") singing w/these ladies might come, might not: for now, i like becky & karling, respectively, having the limelight. as a sideman, i hang back & put in the best, most stylistically appropriate music pts i can rather than try to steal the spotlight, detracting from the star's thing. my job's to make her look good by playing well & chirping the occasional i-hope-funny off-mike aside (tho becky warned me right before downbeat, "don't act weird," which left me so confused, i couldn't say anything!! i don't know how weird i am, but i know ppl tend to laugh when i speak, which feels good & must be good for the show... right? plus genius james says we're both weirdos & he "gets me," which i find flattering cause he is an amazingly gifted, authentic performer!). my hope is, if i don't hog the stage in a band that's not mine, i can leave the audience wanting more instead of wanting to toss me off the stage for trying to take over... they didn't come to see ME, after all, tho i spose eventually, if i do it right, they might come in part to see me. :)
- phil alvin showed up unexpectedly @ the ny show... i coulda died!!!! james intveldt's his student & also ex-blasters, & ji (along w/rosie flores) headlined... but phil's been really ill & looked like he'd just gotten out of the hospital, which he has, maybe even released too early... later i hung w/the musicians, including the world's most bawdy & beloved tough-guy bluesman: ppl on the street see him & run over to hug & kiss him, which he does back to males & female alike, & i so love the unabashed affection for humanity & life w/which he swells & overflows... late nite new year's turned into a bukowski novel: music, car rides to noplace, a dark bar of instant friends, the tattooed & sweet-natured bartender, coffee & oj for me, endless drinks for the regulars, clinking glasses, constant conversation, then the bluesman, who bounces & bodyguards when not playing music, was called in off the steamy early-morning street by the yells of the bartender: "he won't get up! he's not breathing!" -- to save the life of a kid od'd in the bathroom. "you should wear a cape," i told him admiringly afterward, once he'd slapped, shook, & soaked the kid back to life, but rattled, he just blinked soberly & said, "now i'm having flashbacks," lit a cigarette, & turned just as a large man walking up the street spied him, laughed joyously, & ran up w/"oh man, oh man, you're still alive! i love this guy!!" they bear-hugged & kissed & began reminiscing, the ugliness of the last few minutes forgotten.
- i'm not used to pulling all-nighters, so it's soon back to the couch for me... it is a new year, & so i resolve this year to love more & suffer less, & when ugly memories or experiences come up, which they do & will, to learn from them, put them in perspective, then put them behind me & look forward to the next adventure, as do my most admired & beloved friends. as the little sign on my wall reads, "breathe deeply... love freely, laugh often, live generously, pray earnestly, & be kind."
- happy new year to all. :)

how many legs does ynnej have?

how you? i fine. writing many songs. exercising a lot! got to do a 12-step call of sorts via phone last night. it helped me as much as the caller, i think! we hung up both resolved not to drink or use. my dear friend donna commented, "you may have saved a life tonight." wow! who could not be grateful? went to wonderful retreat last weekend. that is from whence came this "very special people" shot. how many legs do you count on my body? i like it! :)
gigs coming up, lots more travel, friends & family, meetings, music, life life life... so happy lately. all is well! love to you who read... due to my statcounter, i know for the most part who you are... so i mean love to you ALL.
as dear penni would say, "oh.... YAAAAAAHH..." :) :) :)

sick

- must stop drinking out of glasses after others. and shaking hands. and hugging! and kissing! and gallivanting! must stop driving 800 miles in 5 days, hanging out with friends who've been sick as well as sleep-deprived party animals, eating junk food, exercising on little sleep, staying up over 24 hours at a time.
- no - wait; that all was fun fun fun. but i need a 2nd body to withstand the pounding!!!
- dizzy when stand. fever. throat killing me. entire body freezing cold, all stoved up all day. then the weather changed. it's 40 degrees all of a sudden!! that does not tend to help this human barometer's health...
- only the leftover butt of a kool, discovered under a pile of papers, helped, many hrs ago. know this is some sign of dying, that a smoke would help the pain & sickness. i mean, i'm not even a smoker, by trade!!!
- what happened to this house? cigarette butts in the sink. towels and rugs everyplace. dirty dishes and clothes. the fridge left open. remnants of fried meals. empty booze bottles. in MY trash!! (no, i didn't drink them... also, i haven't emptied the recycling in weeks, & there've been lots of musicians visiting.) electric piano left on for 11 hours. well, at least the instruments got played a bit!
- just got "in a relationship" with my sister's stunning friend kristin. long have wanted to be "in a relationship" w/someone on facebook. facebook would not allow me to be "in a relationship" with the ghost of boris karloff, new orleans louisiana, doug, the cute little dog from the animated movie "up," or even grottu orloff, the cyber monster. apparently, a person's got to be "in a relationship" with a real human being on facebook. i mean, how discriminatory is that?
- kristin has "bride of frankenstein" all over her house. she can really cook up a mean bellywarmer of a meal. and she is gorgeous. maybe it'll go someplace. problem is, i like men and so does kristin. we're both rather super-hetero, in fact. so i guess how especially nice of her to fill my facebook need. this monster must find her mate. or at least have some bs one acknowledged... i think kristin felt the same way. :)
- fb flirting indiscriminately with others male & female. seeing boundaries not just eroding, but a gullywasher of inappropriateness imminent. danger, danger! pried self off facebook, but not after embarrassing exchange w/kristin about eating tuna.
- raining like heck outside all day. i think i forgot to close my truck. my keyboard's in there as well as left-over gear the inebriated musicians decided to keep with me. this tho i won't even see them maybe for weeks or months. there's also fog. rain all up and down california. people have called asking if there's snow. fishing for a visit. come on up! i'll be the pile laying in the corner, listening to 5 royales radio on pandora. apparently pandora is stupid. they have 5 royales listed as "5 royals." just in case you want to add that station.
- so... cold... ohhhhhhh... goodbye...

distracting self from needing to vacuum up dog hair!

oh boy oh boy oh boy! spun, won, fecund, done, sun, & myriad happy rhymes! i was reminded recently that the man of 1001 faces is not lon chaney! we all killed arcade zombies to jukebox howlin wolf, smoked green cigarettes & watched tom & jerry, rolled & rocked, tho no socks came off... god of heaven & earth & all in-between, you expand my circle of friends & goodness all the time, & tho life continues to contain speed bumps, if i pay attention, i am rewarded more than ever can i repay...
it's autumn now, but life's in the air & the billowing painted sky last night cracked & flashed & boomed & rained rhythmic fragrant tears & as the storm sailed across desert & valley & headed out to coast, its earthy aroma delighted all i heard from. following the storm's progress by way of phone & facebook -- i liked it! :)
life life life: going deep, keeping it light... how you? my mind-state's fractured-by-happiness & fun... a light rain falls... must go clean... must go clean... so easy to procrastinate, play music... will post gigs soon; hope you enjoy this video. if not, go to another site, for pete's sake!
"we're so stupid. you're a dumb girl. you smell," said my friend, but it was funny, not mean. i know many monsters, often being one myself, & prefer the happy ones, as would any sane person, which i happen to be right now. so i hung out w/this monster & his friends the other night; like all the coolest monsters, he's misunderstood, but still the most comforting presence in the room; weird & rough & profane, but also kind & fun & attentive, w/ultimately -- i think -- a nobility that comes from being busted-up yet surviving, coming out stronger, mended by the strong glue of love & experience bringing wisdom... gotta go clean now for cattie ness & the revenge's arrival: it's a band slumber party! dusk devils, you are next! pack your bags!! :) "friend(s)... good..." have a nice one, friends. :)