glitches, shin splints, crazy man crazy, life life life

-> yesterday i recorded an EP, w/sharon marie producing, here in bakersfield. talented & nice sharon runs B2 studios here w/gary batsch - she's also the daughter of the late carolina cotton, western singer-yodeler of the silver screen & 1940s recording fame, as well as long-time & beloved bksfld elementary school teacher.
-> i ran over to record after the oral language festival (school-work event: the girls did great!). sharon & i (well, 99.9% sharon) spent more time figuring out the recording set-up than actually recording! she figured out how to record me in real time & get a "live vibe," as she called it, as i played drums, keyboards, & sang...
-> the EP is about 25 mins long & has 13 songs. we recorded all in one take (well, i did 4 songs over because i got shin splints), glitches & all, no overdubs, punch-ins, edits, nada. what fun! it came out rough but full of life. some people won't like it, but i can't much care. life's too short! :)
-> sharon's posted my version of "goo goo muck" on B2's page. it'll only be there for a week because they rotate songs that frequently! www.myspace.com/b2studio ... soon, i'll have cds. and then what??? well, i have many ideas, & none involve fame & fortune, just hopes to maximize the fun potential in my tiny & short life. :)
-> happy week, everyone. :)

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

for more fantastic videos, check out dusk devils favorites at http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=duskdevils... youtube's a treasure! i could add 100s more, if there were time!!! (ps - if you love gene taylor's piano playing, check www.gene-taylor.com - gene now lives in belgium, but will be in the socal & bay area in dec to play shows w/dave alvin, bazz & bateman! these will be don't-miss events! :) whoops - gotta run...

(an early) mele kalikimaka from the chair of perpetual penance (which somehow is lots of fun, anyway)

-yrs ago, i started drawing christmas cards. bettie page, frankenstein, chuck berry, 40s pinup, siamese twin santas, senor wences takeoff: a bit bizarre, but in their way giving people a smile, i always hope. :) one yr i aped a chas addams design, & kinko's made me sign a release from liability before they'd print it!
- more recently i've photoshopped rather than drawn cards: the lazy way out. i never draw anymore, as is! the lazy route brings quick kicks, yet disappoints. i know i can do more.
- this wk i unexpectedly found myself w/extra time on my hands & so am having a creative burst. playing my one-woman band set like a maniac- running long distances- enjoying mtgs- working w/newcomers- eating fine holiday meals- watching movies- readying for upcoming music shows: what joys these are!! yesterday am, i took a pack of crayons & drew my christmas card. :) (do you do this? i most long to draw, or do anything "creative," when the moment hits & i DON'T have the appropriate supplies... it's demented & stubborn, maybe, or what mama calls a "penance mentality." it just feels too easy, like cheating, to have exactly what's needed, more honest & thrifty to be forced to use what's already there - in this case, a very dull pencil & crayons.)
- i'm grateful today to still have SOME of the ability i had when younger, enough anyway to still be able to (sort of) render the results i seek.
- father damien was stubborn & struggled, was good & heroic. he did what his soul called him to do, not what others told him was "acceptable." he helped & helped & helped instead of just thinking about it: all constructive action, no empty talk.
- his sacrifice & selflessness embody the true spirit of the holidays. what american doesn't know the venal corporate-capitalist version? an early christmas wish to all who read this.

happy, happy thanksgiving

this morning's phantom pie run at hart park was wonderful: happy people by the 100s, lovely sunrise, rolling foothills, heart-pumping uphills, muscles straining, health restored by activity, then the long downhill flat-out haul-butt back to hart park, bonfire, delicious food, joy. i was told all the extra pies & food go the homeless shelter, which made the whole thing even nicer.
then a gal showed up at the wmn's mtg, paroled from prison yesterday to the bksfld hotel. problem was, her family was waiting for her in carson city today for thanksgiving, she wept, & she was paroled to bakersfield & must stay til monday. at the hotel last night, people cried, screamed in terror, yelled, knocked on her door all night. the walls were smeared w/blood from all the junkies, & she woke covered w/bedbugs. she just celebrated one year sober & knew she had to get to a mtg right away.
after the mtg, i stepped up to ask if i could get her a nicer hotel rm til tomorrow, when her mom's wiring her $ to do so, but my sponsor beat me to it & took the woman home w/her.
tears sprang to my eyes, & do so now as i think of my sponsor's kindness. life IS good when we can overcome fear & just help one another. the deepest human trait is not fear, but love, & this love can lead us to our most true selves. our human purpose is to help, & to love... tho this gets obscured by so many worldly calamities.
happy turkey day to all who read this. i am "giving thanks" today for having the ability & opportunity to appreciate that it IS thanksgiving. i give thanks for being placed in a life where i'm able to learn to be more happy, joyous, & free by way of gratitude, positive service to others & development of the gifts i've been given.
to thine own self be true, & happy thanksgiving to you.

turkey / phantom pie run this thursday!!!

(from bk track club website - this sounds like FUN!!!!) Phantom Pie Run - Meet at section 7 of Hart Park for a fun run or walk of between 3 and 12 miles starting at 6am. Bring a pie to share with a couple hundred of your fellow health enthusiasts. What a great way to kick off Turkey day!

may i fare better than poor johnny... dyspnea & me

i got to ride on our teachers' union's float in the vet day's parade this wkend w/ two dear students, wonderful girls, then we went to the library (they'd never been to it) & sonic (same). we teachers'd put our float together over 2 weekends & it was downright right, in my mind, w/handpainted murals of kids & signs created by students & banners reading "bakersfield educators love & respect our veterans" & "be patriotic: vote" (i got to paint that last one). (we grew up w/dad playing "union maid" & "this land is your land" on his guitar while we all sang. BETA is a darn good union, tho my bro-in-law's in denver isn't, & i know people have their complaints. i can only speak for mine: it's necessary & important, as is the concept of unionism, which, like religion & political philosophies, can get twisted in the hands of humans.)
at the 1st parade turn, the ray charles version of "america the beautiful" swelled & all these smiling little old people in military uniforms came into view in their lawn chairs & we all waved & cheered one another &, oh boy, it was crying time. the girls were happy; later, my hubby & i watched "ratatouille," which is so great, it'll kill you, even if you be a cynic; it was a wonderful day; i took a long run the next & celebrated my dear friend's bd at the oildale mtg; we had a long long band practice w/a drummer i've known who impressed me a bunch this time (haven't heard him play in 3 yrs); we went to greg goodsell's "zombie farm" (in his few secs, he was better than the film, w/a gory death scene, even) at the spotlight; all was just going wonderfully well... then last night i had the worst asthma attack i've had in 5 yrs. i scared the tar outta my hubby & myself. i thought it was curtains. good lord, what a shock.
stone-cold honky-tonker johnny paycheck died of it, poor soul. what a way to go. i thought i was doing better, but the doc today says, "in most cases, allergies & asthma just get worse."
great. i used to think drowning would be the worst way to check out, but maybe it'd be asthma or COPD or emphysema... i guess i shouldn't let my magic morbid mind ponder such things since for now i'm ok, tho i gotta go get a whole bunch of inhalers & pills. just be grateful. long as i can continue to be mostly in my right mind in this world of students, family, friends, music, exercise, movies, & more, my complaints only could be those of spoiled brat, or a fearful egoist. so if i have to feel like a fish out of water here & there, well, i can just hope that won't be how i have to check out, & deal w/it: take my meds, try to remember that i don't have this condition licked. (merde.)
i thank goodness right now i don't have the nicotine jones. a lifetime ago i had a beau whose mom was at the hospital in oildale, in a tent w/emphysema, & we snuck her cigarettes. i remember her giggling like a naughty little girl. my boyfriend just looked sad: he did it cause he loved his mama, but we knew it was dirty & wrong. fear, denial, wonder, happiness, ups & downs: c'est la vie.

tweetleedeedledeedee, deedeedeedee

the time FINALLY changed!!!! getting ready for work's no longer such a drag, with my morning now starting at dawn's crack rather than when night seems to be dragging its sick, exhausted carpet to bed. morning sounds: the chirp tweet-tweet of avian symphony, the bang crash-crash & long lonely whistles of the train yard, traffic washing by on the roads outside. right now the peeping sun's bathing away night with slate, pale gray, blue rising out of purple, red, pink, then morning's promise: that gorgeous golden sky. (one nice thing about smog is, it sure makes a lovely dusk-dawn palette. & these days in backwardsville, with smog mostly abated by autumn, the loveliness just zings a person alive.) alive, alive! watching the season change makes a soul feel it.
:)

nothin's as fun as playing the drums

well, some things are... but the near-rhyme's what matters for now. :)
mwahahahahahahaha.... heppy halloveeeeeeeeeen...

musicus interruptus, daughter of yodeling bombshell, feliz cumpleanos to bomar, the oldest living graduate

yippee! art fein sent me a mix cd titled "rule88jen" (so tired from wk, i had to ask him why "rule88" & not "rule62" & he said "piano, dummy!!" duhhh...) so excited to receive a disc made just for me, full of rockin' piano hillbilly R&B rockabilly, i opened it & dang! art forgot to put the disc in the jewel case... he said he'll be at the post office tomorrow, so i've still got something to look forward to there... i decided to record the solo act w/sharon marie (country yodel-western singer carolina cotton's daughter - read elsewhere on this blog about dear mrs. cotton - & sharon herself's a piano player & local musician, too!). i like that i'll be doing it local - i AM from backwardsfield!!! i like sharon a lot, plus this way there'll be the spirit of mrs. cotton, w/whom i taught school... it feels homey & family & "right," those things that keep me centered instead of manic (i seem to go both ways)... well, it's bomar's bd, so we're off for a halloween/bd bash in sonora (gold country) w/motorcycle-program good friends from afar, then tomorrow i have my masters program graduation ceremony in sf. best to all who read... & to all who read this... & to all who help others to read... blablabla

so long, don't know where i'm going, but so long

So long, don't where I'm going
But so long, you know you done me wrong
So long, because I know I'm not the one

Goodbye, please tell me why
Goodbye, you always make me cry
Oh why, why are you never satisfied

So long, I'm all packed up and on my way
So long, you'll need me some ol' sunny day
So long, yes I'm, I'm going to stay



http://www.tous-arts.net/fats7.html <- here's a "newer" version of this song, with its so-sad, so simple, so beautiful solo, not ruined by even one wheedle-wheedle of show-off guitar -- i think it's just perfect, the aural equivalent of a huge shuddering cry, like the end of that saul bellow novella i mentioned below... these kinds of songs aren't knock-offs or throw-aways or "simple" to me at all. they're all heart & soul sincerity, & give me hope & make me want to live & love another day.

missin the spiritual sceneo, seein the hillbilly dino

this time of yr i'm SUPPOSED to be in the sequoias at a spiritual retreat w/women from all over the state, something i always anticipate happily... but on a dang day i was wiped-out-sick home from work, i goofed & ordered tickets for us to go see ron white that same night!! yes, tater salad, that suave & hunky lone star comedian (who had a markedly different look early on - see pic! i like it!!)... drat! but the guy's finer than frog hair split four ways, handier than hip pockets on a hog, slicker than deer guts on a greased doorknob, so we're going.
i'll miss out on good & serene times w/my galfriends, so i hope tonight brings lotsa laughs. (laughter! one of the sacredest human states!) :) & that maybe ron white will go back to his chubby good-ole-boy look, instead of texan-dean-martin...

catapult to musical stardom thwarted by I-5 closure

:) ... well, i TRIED to get down to frank sprague's wichita falls studio in no-hollywd yesterday, but nature had other ideas. a huge truck pile-up/accident near newhall has closed I-5 in both directions near the 14 interchange... 2:30+ from bako to castaic, stuck in solidly-jammed traffic, after many confused calls to family, friends, iceman, art fein, frank trying to get road info, i heard the radio compare this damage to that of the '94 sylmar earthquake. that's it: i knew i had to turn back to bako.
immediately i was flying back up the rd at 70mph, instead of the 0 of before! "that's so program," said friend clancy, whom i was supposed to meet at a mtg in his area (a mile from friend kristi's 40th bd, which i also missed due to the accident!!). "change directions & everything flows smoothly."
ain't it the truth!
i got home safe. not so for people hurt & killed in the crash. i have nothing to complain about, no worries...
w/upcoming wkends booked solid, looks like my career as a D-league cult music figure is on hold again... oil well. :) like i've said, i can't understand the big picture, so why should this upset me? i'm smaller than a quark in this big life, so w/this chance dashed, now will look under some other leaf for the next possible big or small fun.
c'est la vie, yall! stay sick, turn blue, rock & roll hoochy koo. :)

the cowboy rides away

a young cousin by marriage passed away suddenly the other day. he was a most upstanding, personable, polite, friendly boy, a true winner of a human being w/a wonderful sister cut out of just the same strong, beautiful cloth. only 16 yrs old, he died in a riding accident while doing chores. (the family work w/horses & ranch. they are kind, hard-working, likeable, upright, solid, not one bit neurotic.) what a shocking & sad deal. why him? thoughts about "a life cut short" overwhelm, if a person's not careful. why do some get to go on (at least for today) & others perish? life just ain't fair.
my feeling is we're all so tiny in the overall scheme of things, we are absolutely incapable of seeing any big picture. it's just impossible. so what seems so important on the individual scale is nothing in the end. i likely won't matter in 100 yrs, & you likely won't, either. that's the way of life & we all get one shot, so take comfort in that non-importance & seize the day (saul bellow).
people don't die to teach me anything. however, i did learn from midnight (he was born at the stroke of, so that became his name), who lived a happy & full life, more in 16 yrs than many do in 4x that. sat., the ranch in springville, where the family lives, will be packed w/every kid from north high (where midnight was a student) & 100s of others. heck, maybe thousands. i hear the family ordered 60 tables, a dance floor, & has plenty of food. their beloved boy will be well-remembered w/tears, gratitude, & lots of love.
i wish tommy, yolanda, jennifer, michael, & family peace.
the absolute only good to come of this is our bestest cousin flew here from tx w/her kids to be w/the family. "i wish i was here for a happier reason," she said last night. in the end, all there is is love, & what could be more important?

ramblin' man, rockin' jesus, mercy w/false start

today i've spent recording, then uploading, then trying to send one-woman band stuff to frank sprague for next wk's recording session... a couple obscene metaphors/ colloquialisms would describe my tedious missteps, false starts/stops, & problems (continually breaking high hat, sore throat hampering singing, fingernails sticking between keyboard keys [i forgot to cut them!!! duhhh!!], files too large to be uploaded needing to be reconfigured & resaved)... i ended up also uploading some stuff that sounded a lot better, the songs i did for the tribute to slim the drifter back in august. i can't remember where i put the mike that time, but it worked!! i need to diagram this stuff!!
might have to go back to using just the bass drum, w/cymbal bungeed to piano stand & sounding on the bass drum kickback. the high hat/bass drum set up is too problematic right now!!! i guess i'm just gonna have to go into the vault & go buy a new high hat set-up...
anyhow, here also is a snippet from what i recorded for frank - evidence of my technical difficulties!

mercy with mistake...

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slim the drifter t...

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luddite: the boom is back

using the program "slowgold" (the old99 band bought it for me for my bd!), i no longer have to try to use my "ear," but can use a "computer program" to actually SLOW DOWN the songs, "loop" sections of them so that they play over & over & over, & then be able to parrot solos to the best of my (limited) ability... (www.slowgold.com) i used it the other day to learn pt of "the auctioneer," & mebbe it'll help me learn to yodel like old99 rob (oh, i mean "iceman").
on the 1-wmn band front, i've been playing my bass drum backwards.
properly "orientated," it now booms again! :)
i'm glad brian lee hubby discovered this before i go record w/franky lee producer next wkend down south... :)

duskdevils "green door" youtube / POST #200!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

art fein put a new (old) video up on youtube of the dusk devils. (also videos of candye kane & carlos guitarlos!) it's listed on his page at www.sofein.com (look for screen shot of me looking like the wicked witch of the west) :)
you also can see it at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zc18WHzIsJE (copy & paste that address into your browser)
ps - if your comment disappeared below, it's cause of a misunderstanding w/art over what he wanted posted as a comment... i had to hide all comments under that date so's not to inconvenience/embarrass mr. fein, who's been so kind. you can't delete just one on here...

9/30, bakersfield sound music, fishlips, high noon

here in backwardsfield tomorrow, the real deal, the good stuff!... google "fishlips" & "bakersfield sound" for more info... hope you can go! :)

vinyl fetish

you have to click on it to open the coolest web graphic ever (below) :)

the unifying of "opposites," the illusion of separation, myspace, & the boring lives of teachers

today's local paper had a postage-stamp tiny color pic of dusk devils from yrs back on a pg 1 story re myspace. then in class today, coincidence?, we talked about media products & manipulations, like myspace, so i told the kids to for extra credit find my pic in the paper ("why were YOU in the paper?!?" they exclaimed, maybe a little horrified, because how possibly could a TEACHER be interesting enough for print?)... as pt of the lesson, we analyzed bakotopia a little, since the school district has myspace blocked. after, 3 girls got bkotpia's url. on the small chance they'd go in & find my profile, i figured i should write a short bio, do some positive propagandizing...
after writing it, i realized it's sure nice not to have to hide. i don't have secrets w/these kids. i play music, i write, i worry, i fret, i ponder, i'm wimpy & vacillating & bossy at times, i'm kinda weird, but i know in a good way: just a human, in other words. there's no worry about running into them or their families when drunk or being somehow else inappropriate because i'm just not that way, haven't been for a long, long time. i'm even trying not to cuss, tho everyone stubs their toe now & then. (and i do enjoy creative cussers like aunt rita & tammy.) it's good to feel clean & mostly true...
i thank the secret society that saved my life. they're a bunch of do-gooders & lifesavers, & i learn all the time from them how to live somewhat peacefully, usefully, & happily, w/my dreams & goals in line w/the greater good, i trust. my recent masters degree experience in sf at new college, a life-changing deal, didn't hurt, either. :)
here's the updated profile: http://www.bakotopia.com/home/User/jennyangel

red bulls + monsters + vitamins = no sleep

of course, like some curse, i got sick three days ago, w/a showlet tonight. bolstered w/vitamins & red bull, i was dragging myself out the door when brian got popped right in the eye w/a flying bungee - blood everywhere, just horrible!!! i thought we were gonna have to take him to emergency, but once we got him patched up, he insisted he didn't need stitches & wanted to go to the show... later we were so grateful the bungee hadn't hit 1/4" lower because (mustn't go there -- shuddddddder)... as is, he told everyone all night, "you shoulda seen the OTHER guy!" he's gonna have quite a shiner. i was so thankful he wasn't hurt worse & was so willing still to go to the party. brian is quite dear... :)
tammy's party was such a success!! i knew that girl had tons of friends, but tons of family, too? she is widely & well-loved, it is obvious: there must've been 150 people there for her! :) i saw people from the distant past, & longtime pal, writer greg goodsell, showed up as "doctor death" (the party's theme was funerary)... after the basque feed & tammy tributes, byron played acoustic tunes, opening w/"6 days on the road" & "little red riding hood"! vince galindo & i approved; byron has great facial expressions & personality for the stage. next up was an old-timey country-bluegrass trio from kernville, very professional, would've sounded right at home on prairie home companion: david nigel lloyd & daughter ursula fully enjoyed their set, & their woman singer/guitarist had a lovely warmth. then i was up, & as i suspected, i couldn't hear (should've gone w/instinct & used keyboard amp, too: monitors never seem set up for high female voice/keyboard, or maybe it's sound guys who aren't used to dialing that in), & my dang high hat took a crap halfway thru the 2nd song!! shantell then let me use hers, which was a marked change (much nicer), but then i was thrown off by playing the stiffer drum & i know my timing stunk in too many spots. oh well; the audience cheered like i can hardly remember ever hearing, seriously: it was amazing -- & i know tammy was happy! (looking at the pix from brian, i see i never should wear this dress again when i have to sit... it was very flattering til i sat down & some circus tent effect took over!! i know i need longer hems now that i have to sit to play drums, but i guess not quite this long & puffy & bustled... this is something i guess i'll figure out as i go...)
"FINALLY we could hear your singing," said david kindly. (i guess, therefore, the singing sounded ok - i couldn't tell! good news from david!)
"that must be like going for a run," commented nathan (glen), a guy i knew 20 yrs ago. funny, i didn't sweat tonight like when i have practiced. maybe it was all the red bull i drank (no sweat left!) to get myself off the sick bed. no dinner, either! too nervous from brian's eyeball incident! anyways, yes, it is quite a workout to do all the music by myself.
"i've never seen anything like that," a guy remarked about my set-up. and yes, ladies & gents, i DO believe what i'm now doing is unique! the good part is, it's bound to get better, so heads up, bloodshot bill, i'll be hopping on your traincar pretty soon here... :)
next was 3 chord whore. those gals are really onto something!! their eff-it, liberated, woman-love punkrock presence really goes over big, w/gals dancing wildly every time they play. darcy has the most wonderful expressive pretty frontwomanly face, & heather does, too. i'd love to have big popping violety eyes like those two have, but i have to make do w/my squinty hispanic-mediterranean ones, instead. shantell is a heckuva hard-rock drummer, & i'm always impressed by how much sound those 3 women make, w/heather's punk power chords, shantell's thunder-drumming, & darcy's full throated singing. they speak to lots of gals in the audience - guys, too. i hope whatever they want to have happen for them career-wise, flat does.
... now it's 1:45 am & here i is. bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......... tired, but heart palpitating. good old energy drinks.
thank you, tammy & byron, for your extreme generosity & friendliness to many, including me. a good night to be alive it was, once again.
ps - thank you thank you thank you to all my friends who showed up... :)